Please Take All My Money Microsoft

The source code reveals Microsoft's desperate browser strategy. Any search containing "ch", "chr", "chro", "chrom", or "chrome" triggers an Edge promotion. It's like trying to order a Coke at a Pepsi factory. The guy's face says it all - the universal expression of "I just want the thing I asked for, not a lecture about why your thing is better." Microsoft's browser desperation is reaching stalker-level intensity.

Content Zeke Smith any Yesterday at 1:34 PM probably however I cant diagnose it easily and its not just 1 bug its also confused the hell out of git wait wtf wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait it just worked... WTF 1 did nothing obviously I am a genius and I know what fixed it 1 figured it out windows sucks literally caused by a windows filesystem issue

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The circle of Windows dependency is brutal. In 2020, we were all clinging to Windows 7 like it was the last stable relationship we'd ever have. "Don't force me to install 10!" we screamed, treating Microsoft's upgrade notifications like a clingy ex. Fast forward to 2025 when Windows 10 support ends, and suddenly we're the desperate ones. "Don't leave me!" we'll sob to Windows 10 as Microsoft shoves Windows 11 (or whatever fresh UI nightmare they've cooked up) down our throats. The true Stockholm syndrome of tech. First you hate it, then you can't live without it. Tale as old as computing time.

Choosing between fixing Microsoft Teams and inventing an entirely new state of matter? Clearly the harder decision ever made at Microsoft HQ. The sweat-drenched executive perfectly captures what happens when you realize Teams has been laggy garbage for years, but hey, let's pour resources into quantum computing and metaverse nonsense instead! Meanwhile developers everywhere are just begging for a video call that doesn't eat 8GB of RAM or randomly disconnect people during important client presentations. Priorities, am I right?

Microsoft standing there like the Terminator while Windows 10 users cower in fear is just *chef's kiss*. Remember when they said Windows 10 would be the "last version of Windows" and then suddenly Windows 11 appeared with hardware requirements that made half our perfectly good machines "obsolete"? Classic Microsoft move - create the problem, sell the solution. Nothing says "we value your loyalty" like forcing you to buy new hardware because your 3-year-old CPU doesn't support some security feature nobody asked for. The countdown to obsolescence starts the moment you unbox your PC!