Programming practices Memes

Posts tagged with Programming practices

Stop Shortening Variable Names Istg

Stop Shortening Variable Names Istg
Ah yes, the ancient programmer tradition of naming variables like you're being charged by the character. "Why use 'playerCharacterPosition' when 'pcp' works?" they say, while their IDE helpfully autocompletes it anyway. The melting yellow creature perfectly captures that internal meltdown when someone suggests using descriptive variable names. "But my fingers will get tired from all that typing that the computer does for me!" Meanwhile, six months later, nobody remembers what 'plobjcaracy' was supposed to mean, including the person who wrote it.

Catch Twenty Two

Catch Twenty Two
The eternal paradox of software development: we desperately want good documentation for other people's code, but when it comes to documenting our own? Suddenly we're that mysterious figure walking away into the cosmic void. Let's be honest—we all start projects thinking "I'll document this properly" but then deadlines hit and it's just "the code is self-explanatory" followed by angry comments six months later when even YOU can't remember how your own sorcery works. Future you will hate present you. It's the circle of dev life.

Still Better Than Nothing

Still Better Than Nothing
The image shows an empty or barely visible diagram of what appears to be some kind of device interface with the title "How programmers comment their code". It's the perfect representation of that code you inherited with exactly zero helpful comments. You know, the 10,000-line monstrosity where the only comment is // TODO: fix this later from 2014. Or my personal favorite: /* Don't touch this. I don't know why it works. */ After 15 years in the industry, I've accepted that comprehensive documentation is like unicorns—everyone talks about them, but nobody's actually seen one in production.

Globally Installed Packages Vs Virtual Environments

Globally Installed Packages Vs Virtual Environments
The eternal battle of Python dependency management summed up in one religious allegory. The devil tempts you with the convenience of globally installed packages - just one "pip install" away from corrupting your entire system. Meanwhile, Python Jesus advocates for the righteous path of virtual environments, keeping your dependencies organized and your soul clean. 105,889 globally installed packages is basically a deal with the devil that future you will have to exorcise during your next migration. The path to salvation is just a "python -m venv" away.

One Of Our Lead Programmers

One Of Our Lead Programmers
OH. MY. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of this lead programmer! Three whole months of "vibe coding"?! You know what that means, right? Just casually writing whatever code FEELS right without any plan, documentation, or actual thought process. 💀 Meanwhile, the entire team has been having SEVENTEEN meetings about architecture patterns and proper coding standards! The face of pure shock in that meeting room must have been PRICELESS when this coding rebel just confessed to essentially throwing spaghetti at the wall for a quarter of the year! The real tragedy? His code probably still works better than the over-engineered solutions everyone else spent weeks planning. The universe is so unfair sometimes!

Both Make Sense In Different Contexts

Both Make Sense In Different Contexts
The eternal holy war of naming conventions. Left side: snake_case with verb-first style (a Java dev's nightmare). Right side: Hungarian notation with noun-first approach (makes Python devs twitch uncontrollably). Both perfectly valid until you try to collaborate with literally anyone else, at which point your git history becomes a battlefield of reformatting commits. The real question isn't tabs vs spaces—it's whether your function names read like English sentences or technical manuals.

I Was So Wrong

I Was So Wrong
First panel: Developer screaming at TDD like it's some annoying piece of paper being shoved in their face. Second panel: Reluctantly takes a bite of Test-Driven Development. Third panel: Cautiously realizes it's not so bad. Fourth panel: Dreamy eyes - "Why did I fight this for so long? My code is actually... reliable now." The journey from "tests are a waste of time" to "I can't believe I ever coded without tests" happens to the best of us. Just takes one production catastrophe that could've been prevented with a simple test to see the light!

You Can Run But You Can't Hide From Technical Debt

You Can Run But You Can't Hide From Technical Debt
You can run, but your technical debt follows you everywhere. That mountain of hastily written code, those "temporary" workarounds from 2021, and all those TODOs you swore you'd fix "next sprint" are patiently waiting at your new job. Turns out switching companies doesn't erase your coding sins—it just gives you fresh victims to explain why "this particular implementation is a bit... unconventional."

Write Code Without Comments? Right To Jail

Write Code Without Comments? Right To Jail
When a senior dev asks if you wrote code without comments, you know you're about to face a military tribunal-level interrogation. The look of utter disbelief followed by immediate sentencing is just *chef's kiss*. Submitting uncommented code to review is basically a declaration of war against your fellow developers. Future maintainers will be excavating your logic like archaeologists trying to decipher hieroglyphics without a Rosetta Stone. Remember folks, code tells the computer what to do, but comments tell other humans why you did it that way. Skip them at your peril!

Sounds A Bit Simple

Sounds A Bit Simple
Ah, the duality of random number generation! The top panel shows the proper way—importing libraries like random , time , or os to generate proper pseudo-random numbers with good entropy. The bottom panel reveals the chaotic evil approach—hardcoding your "random" generator without external input, which is basically just saying return 4 because it was randomly chosen by fair dice roll. Guaranteed to be random! The twisted face in the second panel perfectly captures the deranged energy of a developer who thinks Math.floor(Math.random() * 6) + 1 is too much work and opts for const getRandomNumber = () => 4; instead. Cryptographers are screaming somewhere.

What Does That Mean

What Does That Mean
THE ABSOLUTE TRAGEDY of variable naming! Everyone's DESPERATE to create cryptic little monsters like "fm" but when it comes time to actually UNDERSTAND what these hieroglyphic abominations mean? CRICKETS. TUMBLEWEEDS. DEAD SILENCE. It's the coding equivalent of writing a passionate love letter in invisible ink and then setting the paper on fire. "Look at me, I saved 11 whole characters by naming this variable 'x' instead of 'customerTransactionHistory'! I'M A GENIUS!" And then three months later you're sobbing at 3 AM wondering what demonic possession led you to believe 'fm' was an intuitive name for ANYTHING. 💀

The Cryptic Variable Crusader

The Cryptic Variable Crusader
The eternal battle between readable code and cryptic shortcuts! That one dev who insists on using x , tmp , and mgr instead of userAccountBalance , temporaryStorage , or connectionManager . Future maintainers will spend hours deciphering what bm.prc() does while the original author smugly thinks they're being efficient by saving 17 keystrokes. Bonus points if they also comment with "obvious function, no explanation needed." Clean code isn't just nice—it's practically a moral obligation. Your colleagues aren't mind readers, and neither is your future self at 2am during a production outage!