Build-time Memes

Posts tagged with Build-time

The #1 Programmer Excuse For Legitimately Slacking Off
Docker Devops Programming
2 days ago 117.2K views 0 shares
The #1 Programmer Excuse For Legitimately Slacking Off
The ULTIMATE get-out-of-work-free card has been DISCOVERED! 🏆 When your Docker image is building, you're basically held hostage by technology—a prisoner of progress! The build process can take FOREVER (or at least long enough for a coffee, snack, and existential crisis). Even your boss can't argue with the sacred "Docker is Building" excuse. They might try to question your productivity, but once they see that terminal crawling with build logs, they'll dramatically retreat in technical defeat. The perfect crime! Docker: simultaneously revolutionizing containerization AND procrastination since 2013!

What If Companies Do So Much With TS/JS To Save Compile Time Coffee Breaks?!
Javascript Typescript Programming Frontend
2 days ago 139.9K views 0 shares
What If Companies Do So Much With TS/JS To Save Compile Time Coffee Breaks?!
The eternal battle between compilation time and coffee breaks! While we're all busy pretending to wait for C++ to compile so we can scroll Reddit, TypeScript/JavaScript devs are out here ruining the sacred tradition with their interpreted languages. The conspiracy board in the background perfectly represents the chaotic thought process of someone trying to justify why their build still needs 20 minutes in 2023. "But optimization takes time!" Yeah, and so does my third coffee, thank you very much.

This Is Fine
C++ Devops Programming Debugging
2 months ago 103.8K views 0 shares
This Is Fine
Looking at this dependency graph is like watching a murder mystery where every header file is both a victim and a suspect. The C++ include nightmare on full display here—a tangled web that would make even the most hardened senior dev reach for the whiskey drawer. Circular dependencies, cascading includes, and enough arrows to start a small archery business. And somewhere in this mess, a junior dev is about to add another header file and bring the whole 45-minute compile time to its knees. Remember kids, this is why we have forward declarations and precompiled headers. But who am I kidding? We'll all be debugging this spaghetti next sprint anyway.

Guess Who Accidentally Clicked Rebuild All
Programming Csharp C++ Debugging
2 months ago 95.8K views 0 shares
Guess Who Accidentally Clicked Rebuild All
That thousand-yard stare of a developer who just hit "Rebuild All" right before a meeting. Now he's trapped in his own personal prison, watching helplessly as his CPU melts, fans scream, and battery drains faster than his will to live. The compiler is probably still on file 3 of 9,457. He's calculating whether he has time to get coffee, update his resume, or possibly move to a new country before it finishes.

Kernel Development: A Test Of Infinite Patience
Linux Programming
3 months ago 119.8K views 0 shares
Kernel Development: A Test Of Infinite Patience
Kernel compilation is the ultimate test of patience. You make one tiny change to a variable, hit that clean build button, and suddenly you're trapped in a time warp that makes continental drift look speedy. The meme perfectly captures that feeling of sitting there, arms crossed, staring daggers at your hourglass (or progress bar) as precious minutes of your finite existence drain away. The best part? You know deep down you'll be doing this at least 17 more times today. Compile, wait, curse, repeat—the sacred ritual of kernel development.

Memory Safety Achieved
Rust Devops Hardware Programming
3 months ago 166.8K views 0 shares
Memory Safety Achieved
When your Rust compiler decides to turn your CPU into a space heater... that's peak memory safety! The irony is delicious - Rust promises memory safety but your system becomes completely unusable in the process. All cores maxed at 97°C while compiling, and the poor dev had to grab their phone to even take this screenshot because the machine was too busy contemplating the ownership model of every single variable. The final punchline? "It's safe when you can't use your computer" - technically correct, the best kind of correct!