Silly Mistake, Permanent Solution

Content GOT THE PRINCESS! HOW TO SAVE THE PRINCESS BY O toggl USING 8 PROGRAMMING Goon SqUAD LANGUAGES YOU HAVE JAVASCRIPT YoU SPEnD HOURS PICKING LIBRARIES, SETTING UP NODE BUILDING A FRAME WORK FOR THE CASTLE. BY THE TIME YouR FINISHED WITH THE FRAME WORK THE FORT HAS BEEN ABANDONED AND THE PRINCESS HAST MOVED TO ANOTHER CASTLE YOU HAVE YOU HAVE A LIBRARY FOR A CASTLE A LIBRARY FOR THE PRINCESS - CHARGE! YOU RESCUE ThE PRINCESS HER DOG, HER ENTIRE WARDROBE EVERYTHING SHE HAS EVER EATEN... FUCK - DID I FORGET NULL -TERMINATOR YOU HAVE C YOU SPEND HOURS TRYING TO EXPRESS THE ENTIRE RESCUE IN A SINGLE LINQ QUERY YOU GIVE UP AND GO TO STACKOVERFLOW TO HAVE JON SKEET RESCUE THE PRINCESS FOR YOU. YoU HAVE JAVA YOU QUICKLY DEPLOY THE RESCUE TO PRODUCTION YOU DISCOVER YOU'vE LOADED TWO VERSIONS OF THE CASTLE BUT NO PRINCESS YoU HAVE LISP YOU HAVE GO WE DON'T SUPPORT FREEING CAPTURED PRINCESSES, WE ALREADY HAVE THESE FREE PRINCESSES IN THE STANDARD LIBR... WAIT, IS THIS THE PRINCESS FROM THE JAVA PANEL YOU HAVE PASCAL YOU DECLARE YOUR PRINCESS CASTLE RESCUE PLAN THEN YOU GO FOR A DRINK FORGET ABOUT THE IMPLEMENTATION YOU HAVE PHP YOU HAVE TO RESCUE THE PRINCESS... ... IN PHP. MART VIRKUS '16 toggl

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Content 370 testquery("Select saokontonr, saopassword from shopaddon limit 10" PROBLEMS OUTPUT DEBUG CONSOLE TERMINAL (venv) PS C: excel generator python test.py (17566, 563745) (29255, 'meerschweinchenweg") (31231, 'Rudolf') (28454, 'Reiner') (32391, 986345) (31966, 'evfZL4uUXdBeXHey') (11352, 'Lotorazzi') (32418, 'bread') (31722, 68367283) (31847, 'raggitom") -

When you're staring at a dependency graph that looks like someone dropped spaghetti on a whiteboard and hit "visualize," you know you're in for a good time. That's OpenSSL sitting there in the middle like the popular kid everyone wants to hang out with, connected to literally everything. The walking stick figure begging it to burst already? That's every developer who's had to debug a vulnerability that cascades through 47 different packages. One CVE drops and suddenly your entire infrastructure is playing six degrees of OpenSSL. The best part is knowing that if it actually did burst, half the internet would go down faster than a poorly configured load balancer. Fun fact: OpenSSL has more dependencies on it than most developers have on coffee.

Content THIS IS GIT. IT TRACKS COLLABORATIVE WORK ON PROJECTS THROUGH A BEAUTIFUL DISTRIBUTED GRAPH THEORY TREE MODEL. COOL. HOU DO WE USE IT? NO IDEA. JUST MEMORIZE THESE SHELL COMMANDS AND TYPE THEM TO SYNC UP. IF YOU GET ERRORS, SAVE YOUR WORK ELSEWHERE, DELETE THE PROJECT, AND DOWNLOAD A FRESH COPY.

Ah yes, C programming at its finest—writing a C program whose sole purpose is to create and execute a bash script. Because why use one language when you can use two? This developer is basically using a nuclear submarine to cross a puddle. The irony is delicious. The code claims "Programming in C is easy" while demonstrating the most convoluted way possible to print "hello world"—by having C generate a bash script with execute permissions, which then prints the message. It's like building a machine that builds a machine that ties your shoelaces. Four system calls when a single printf would do. This is the programming equivalent of taking a flight from New York to Boston with a layover in Tokyo.