Sure It Is: When NPM Defies The Laws Of Physics

Came in to design buttons, left solving algorithmic puzzles that haven't been relevant since college. The classic bait-and-switch where you apply for a frontend position but they test you like you're joining NASA's engineering team. The blank stare is every developer who just wanted to talk about responsive design but is now mentally calculating time complexity while their soul leaves their body. Fun fact: "Longest Common Prefix" is basically asking you to find the shared beginning of a bunch of strings. Useful for autocomplete features, not so much for centering a div.

Content The Nikola fraud trial has been interesting, but it was this particular claim from a few years ago had me and all my buddies rolling: "The entire infotainment system is a HTML 5 super computer. That's the standard language for computer programmers around the world, so using it let's us build our own chips. And HTML 5 is very secure. Every component is linked on the data network, all speaking the same language. It's not a bunch of separate systems that somehow still manage to communicate." Sentencing is November 28th.

Content JIS DAILY JavaScript Daily JavaScriptDaily 1h Next gen thinking over on Reddit. - Brilliant-8148 11 points 4 days ago I use typescript, but I declare everything as an any because I love the flexibility permalink embed save report reply CharlesStover 8 points 4 days ago This is unironically better than not using TypeScript at all. permalink embed save parent report reply - Brilliant-8148 4 points 4 days ago I know, for my resume! permalink embed save parent report reply 17 8 88 14 10.3K 1 Coderman unlocomax - I use seatbelt but I pass it behind my back because I love the flexibility - This is unironically better than not using SeatBelt at all. -I know, for highway patrol! 11:49 AM Sep 13, 2023 112 Views

Content Planet Deaths 120,315,672,896 Has JavaScript NO NO YES NO NO 9 9 2 NO COINCIDENCE?

The meme brutally murders the misconception that Java and JavaScript are related just because they share "Java" in their names. It's like assuming cars and carpets are related because they both start with "car." The naming similarity is purely coincidental—JavaScript was named during the peak of Java's popularity as a marketing gimmick. One's a compiled, statically-typed language that runs on a virtual machine; the other's an interpreted, dynamically-typed language that powers the web. Different ancestors, different purposes, different ecosystems. Next up: explaining why hamburgers contain no ham.

Content There's a repo on Github containing some scripts used by a tech employee that his coworkers discovered after he left the company. Here's a summary of his shenanigans: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xXx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht I'm keeping those Reply 4 10.3k J