If Only Brendan Eich Had One More Day

JavaScript developers really woke up one day and said "Let's create four different ways to declare variables, each with subtly different rules that will absolutely destroy newcomers' sanity." And then they had the audacity to add const const which is technically valid syntax. The real horror is that last example where var var lets you mutate your string into whatever Lovecraftian nightmare you want. No wonder half of Stack Overflow is just people asking "why doesn't my variable work?" Ten years of experience and I still occasionally get bitten by this nonsense.

Content GOTTHE PRINCESS! HOW TO SAVE THE PRINCESS BY O toggl USING 8 PROGRAMMING Goon SquAD LANGUAGES YOU HAVE JAVASCRIPT YoU SPEND HOUrS PICKING LIBRARIES, SETTING UP NODE BUILDING A FRAME WORK FOR THE CASTLE. BY THE TIME YoUrE FiNIShEd wIth THE FRAME WORK, THE FORT HAS REEN ABANDONED AND THE PRINCESS MAST MOVED TO ANOTHER CASTLE YOU HAVE YOU HAVE A LIBRARY FOR A CASTLE A LIBRARY FOR THE PRINCESS - CHARGE! YOU RESCUE THE PRINCESS HER DOG, HER ENTIRE WARDROBE EVERYTHING SHE HAS EVER EATEN... FUCK - DID I FORGET NULL -TERMINATOR YOU HAVE C YOU SPEND HOURS TRYING TO EXPRESS THE ENTIRE RESCUE IN A SINGLE LING QUERY YOU GIVE UP AND GO TO STACKOVERFLOW TO HAVE JON SKEET RESCUE THE PRINCESS FOR YOU. YOU HAVE JAVA YOU QUICKLY DEPLOY THE RESCUE TO PRODUCTION YoU DISCOVER YoUvE LOADED TWO VERSIONS OF THE CASTLE BUT NO PRINCESS YOU HAVE LISP YOU HAVE Go WE DON'T SUPPORT FREEING CAPTURED PRINCESSES, WE ALREADY HAVE THESE FREE PRINCESSES IN THE STANDARD LIBR... ...WAIT, IS THIS THE PRINCESS FROM THE JAVA PANEL YOU HAVE PASCAL YOU DECLARE YOUR PRINCESS CASTLE RESCUE PLAN THEN YOU GO FOR A DRINK FORGET ABOUT THE IMPLEMENTATION YOU HAVE PHP YOU HAVE TO RESCUE THE PRINCESS... ... IN PHP... MART VIRKUS '16 ProarammerHumor.io toggl

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When JavaScript makes you want to set your computer on fire, just remember Java devs are stuck writing 15 lines of code to print "Hello World" in some corporate basement. Suddenly your undefined is not null errors don't seem so bad. Nothing calms the JavaScript rage like realizing you could be writing enterprise Java instead. Perspective is a beautiful thing.

Content def successors (tree, name) : best1 for key, value in tree.items () : if keyname: for i in range (0, len (value)) : best. append (value (i) if value (il in tree: for keyl, valuel in tree.items (): if keylvalue (il: for x in range (0, len (valuel)): best. append (valuel (x) if valuel (x in tree: for key2, value2 in tree.items () : if key2valuel (x : for z in range (0, len (value2)) : best. append (value2 (z) if value2 (z in tree: for key3, value in tree.items () : if key3value2 z : for fuck in range (0, len (value3)) : best.append (value3 fuck) return best

Content SO IMAGINE IF YOUR SHOPPING LIST COULD MAGICALLY CORRECT ITSELF IF YOU WROTE 'TOMATO' AS A FRUIT INSTEAD OF A VEGETABLE. THAT'S TYPESCRIPT IN REACT, EXCEPT IT'S FOR CODE, NOT GROCERIES, AND... UM, THE LIST ARGUES WITH YOU,