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Oh. My. GOD! It's the eternal holy war of programming paradigms playing out in stick figure drama! 😱
Our brave little functional programming zealot stands on their soapbox proclaiming "JAVA SUCKS" to a crowd that seems mildly interested. Bold move! But then comes the plot twist that sends the pitchfork-wielding mob into absolute RAGE - "BECAUSE OOP SUCKS."
Honey, that's like walking into a Taylor Swift concert and screaming "MUSIC IS TERRIBLE!" The audacity! The drama! The pure, unadulterated functional programming superiority complex on display! 💅
Meanwhile, functional programmers are somewhere sipping tea and mumbling about pure functions and immutability while the OOP crowd collectively loses their inheritance-loving minds.
