I'm Still Happy With It

The dream of coding on a 1.5-inch screen has arrived! VS Code squeezed onto a smartwatch is the ultimate flex for those who think mechanical keyboards aren't uncomfortable enough. Imagine debugging that production issue while grocery shopping—"Hold on, let me just pinch-zoom into line 457 to find that missing semicolon." Your wrist cramps aren't a bug, they're a feature! The best part? You'll spend 99% of your time just trying to tap the right button without hitting three others. Pair programming now means asking someone with smaller fingers to help.

The code tries to allocate 280 TiB for an array, then fails spectacularly with a memory error. Meanwhile, the caption "I'm limited by the technology of my time" perfectly captures that moment when your ambitious project hits the brick wall of hardware reality. Sure, Tony Stark built an Arc Reactor in a cave with scraps, but even he couldn't allocate 280 freaking terabytes of RAM. That's not a Raspberry Pi project—that's a "sell your house for server farm" project.

Remember those predictions about technology freeing us from labor? Yeah, instead we're crafting circuit board arrowheads for the post-apocalyptic tech hunting grounds. Nothing says "advanced civilization" quite like using a motherboard to hunt your dinner after the AI rebellion. Silicon Valley's final contribution to humanity: slightly more efficient spearheads for the neo-tribal warfare that follows after all our smart devices decide we're the real bug in the system.

SWEET MERCIFUL HEAVENS! The sheer ECSTASY when your assembly code finally compiles after 47 hours of staring at hexadecimal nightmares! The meme shows "org.asm" which is basically the file extension for assembly code, but cleverly looks like something... ahem... more pleasurable . Because let's be honest, getting assembly to work is basically the programming equivalent of finding the G-spot while blindfolded and wearing oven mitts. IMPOSSIBLE YET SOMEHOW YOU DID IT!

Remember when we had to optimize code to run on 2MB of RAM? Now we're out here with 16GB machines running Electron apps that somehow still manage to lag. The PS5 and Xbox Series X sitting smugly next to our gaming rigs while ancient consoles like the SNES and original PlayStation got by with kilobytes. Those old-school devs were literal wizards—squeezing Doom into memory smaller than a modern email attachment. Meanwhile, I'm over here watching Chrome devour RAM like it's an all-you-can-eat buffet.

When someone asks my age, I don't give them a number—I just show them PS/2 ports. If they recognize these ancient keyboard and mouse connectors without Googling, we're from the same tech paleolithic era. These circular relics with their color-coded pins were the USB of the '90s, except they required perfect alignment and a small prayer to connect properly. Nothing says "I witnessed the dial-up apocalypse" quite like remembering to check which color goes where. Kids these days with their USB-C will never know the satisfaction of that perfect *click* when you finally got it right after three attempts.