Open A PR And Start Running

Ah yes, Australia's brilliant tech literacy strikes again! Apparently, the dangerous code repositories where developers store their work are just as threatening to children as dance videos and lip-syncing. Someone clearly confused "pushing to master" with some other kind of content. Next up: Stack Overflow to be rated 18+ because all those rejected code snippets might cause emotional damage. The date being 2025 is the cherry on top. At least we have 8 months to prepare for this groundbreaking legislation from people who probably think "git pull" is something you do at a pub.

In the realm of developer clout, 500 GitHub followers makes you practically royalty, while 2 million YouTube subscribers is just... meh. Nothing says "I've made it" like having a handful of fellow nerds who appreciate your elegant solutions to problems nobody else understands. YouTube fame is for the masses—GitHub fame is for the classes. The true knights of the coding round table don't need dance videos and clickbait thumbnails to prove their worth—just clean commits and well-documented PRs.

Time traveler's first rule: check the I/O ports before packing. Nothing says "mission failed" quite like bringing a USB stick to a floppy party. The violent solution seems appropriate - that 90s computer clearly deserves what's coming after the crushing realization that your entire GitHub repo won't fit on 1.44MB. Pro tip: next time, bring a parallel port adapter and enough patience to last until 2023.

That moment when your Git merge turns into a hostile takeover. The cartoon dog screaming "LET ME MERGE" perfectly captures the primal rage that bubbles up when your perfectly crafted branch gets rejected for the 17th time. It's basically Git's version of road rage – stuck on the highway of version control with no exit in sight. Your code isn't asking for permission anymore, it's demanding to be let in. Next step: force push and pray no one notices the git history looking like abstract art.

Imagine casually typing git reset --hard thinking you're just tidying up some build artifacts, only to watch in ABSOLUTE HORROR as your entire day's work evaporates into the void like it never existed. No commit? No stash? Just raw, unfiltered chaos and the soul-crushing realization that you've basically just deleted your own existence from the timeline. That smile? That's the smile of someone who's transcended pain and entered a realm of pure, unfiltered acceptance. The build was failing anyway, right? Who needs those 8 hours of code? Not this guy! He's living in the moment now—a moment with ZERO uncommitted changes because they're ALL GONE FOREVER.

That moment when your code review turns into an interrogation session. "I see you've implemented this feature without documentation... interesting . Now, before I approve your PR, tell me what you thought about that React conference keynote? Didn't catch it? What a shame. Looks like this merge might take a while..." The dark side of open source maintainers that GitHub doesn't want you to see.