The Four Stages Of Debugging Grief

Content chrisk5000 chrisk5000 Almost made fun of an electrician today like "is it an electrician's guild rule that you have to perform 5 minutes of ritual complaining about What Was The Previous Electrician Thinking before you're allowed to fix anything?" but then I remembered I'm a software engineer 6:25 PM Nov 15, 2018 Twitter Web Client 586 Retweets 2.4K Likes ProdrammerHumor.io

When your Git branch visualization looks like a Guitar Hero track, you know you've achieved peak chaos. Those colorful, intertwining lines aren't showing off your musical talent—they're documenting your descent into version control madness. Somewhere between "let me just make a quick fix" and "dear god what have I done," you've created a merge conflict masterpiece that would make even the most hardened DevOps engineer weep. At this point, just hit the reset button and pretend it was all a bad dream.

The AUDACITY of modern development! While the rest of us are drowning in Stack Overflow tabs and questioning our career choices, "vibe coders" are out here summoning AI agents with mystical cauldrons and threatening them with PUNISHMENT if they don't fix bugs! 💀 It's giving "I don't debug, I just intimidate my code until it works" energy. The AI agent in that cauldron is probably thinking "I didn't get trained on 10 trillion parameters for THIS kind of toxic workplace environment!" Meanwhile, the rest of us are manually fixing array indices like PEASANTS.

Content a Sarcasm Mather Don't work hard work intelligent Client: Hello, so I ordered 1,000 cubes for my homemade pyramid but you sent me 998 ones and 2 spheres. Boss: What do you mean, we don't even sell spheres. Client: well, apparently one of your employees spent the entire work day cutting two of them into spheres so he can roll them. Boss: Oh lord, it was probably john, he is kind of an idiot. We will fix this as soon as possible Client: Thanks a lot.

The eternal pain of expecting a simple true or false but getting "Yes" instead! Boolean questions should have binary answers, but somehow non-technical folks (and occasionally that one backend dev) manage to return strings like "Sure", "I think so", or my personal favorite: "It depends." The compiler in my brain throws a TypeError: Cannot convert String to Boolean every single time. The worst part? You can't even use !!response to coerce it properly!

Content When there's a bug in production What do we want? Temp workarounds! How long will we use them? Indefinitely!