The LinkedIn Dream Cap

Content Kristen DiMercurio kdimerc A tip for those of us who work at screens all day: 1. Unclench your jaw 2. Twist your torso from side to side 3. Arch backwards til you're upside down with your hands and feet on the floor 4. Laugh 5. Spider crawl across the room 6. Devour someone whole 7. Haunt the witnesses 22:54 - 32619 Twitter for iPhone

Content DBA Specialist - SQL Server - Junior DBA Specialist - SQL Server Oracle Our client is looking for a DBA Specialist SQL Server to reinforce his team Mission Role - Responsible for the SQL Server databases - Optimise using SQL 2016 2019 in a fully redundant configuration - Monitor performances of Database Systems - Troubleshoot production performance and functional issues - Solid knowledge and experience in T-SQL, including query optimization, stored procedures - SQL Server Installation, Upgrades, Migrations and Configuration - working knowledge of database management (creating databases, users, tables, indexes, partitions) Technical skills - 5-6 vears experience in SQL Server administration - Very good skills in T-SQL - Very good skills in database optimization - Very good skills regarding IT security - Good knowledge on SSIS, SSAS and SSRS - Commodities or Financial Services background desirable - Advanced knowledge on Transact-SQL and scripting - Knowledge of another DB Engine including NoSQL (MongoDB

Content 7 hours ago 0 applicants Full-time Entry level EEl 10,001 employees Accounting You have a preferred skill badge Apply Save To qualify for the role, you must have Bachelor's degree in a technical field andor equivalent work experience 10 years of client side JavaScript experience 3 years of Angular experience 7 years of Query experience 7 years of RESTful application development 10 years of HTML5 experience 10 years of CSS experience Familiarity with and the ability to apply Design Patterns

Content 6 Add lifecycle create before destroy HELP, STEPBRO (less desruptive changes) Update AMIs for bluegreen deploys Fix DB passwords Don't git-diff .tfstate files (obnoxious, like diffing a binary) 8 Please enter the commit message for your changes. Lines startin 9 with '' will be ignored, and an empty message aborts the c 10 On branch better 11 Your branch is up-to-date with 'originbetter' 12 13 Changes to be committed: 14 modified: 15 modified: .gitattributes 16 modified: environmentsalphaconfig.tfvars environmentsalphasecrets. tfvars 17 modified: environmentsalphaterraform. tfstate 18 copied: environmentsalphaterraform.tfstate - envil 19 modified: 20 modified: environmentsstagingconfig.tfvars 21 modified: environmentsstagingterraform.tfstate environmentsstagingterraform.tfstate. backup 22 modified: terraformaws-ecs.tf 23 itsalpha I'M STUCK IN VIM AND CAN'T EXIT

Content ORACLE PostgreSCK SOL Server MysQL' SYBASE IBM DB2. A Microsoft Access X Excel I PREFER A REAL DATABASE I SAID A REAL DATABASE PERFECTION

BEHOLD! The most VISCERAL representation of programming concepts known to mankind! Left side: toilet paper roll with actual paper (0) - it EXISTS but is practically USELESS with that pathetic amount left. Right side: an EMPTY roll holder (null) - absolutely NOTHING there, honey! The database weeps, the variables scream, and somewhere a junior developer is having an existential crisis trying to figure out if they should check for zero or null first. The tragedy! The drama! And you KNOW both situations leave you equally stranded when nature calls. Just like when your function returns either 0 or null and your code wasn't prepared for EITHER scenario!