Now It Makes Sense

Content Change these passwords now Some of your saved passwords were exposed in a non-Google data breach. You should change them now. Learn more This account is at risk http:localhost:8000 admin Change password ProgrammerHumor.

Content O Search Home Popular 4 2 Share rMinecraft uKevinJNquy01 2h v.redd.it 3. C6 20 Awards I coded a friend to play Minecraft with me Kikeuins hi i bestiel pestie Met there! tou are you doing today? oo 0000000000 4 7.3k 407 Share Popular near vou rik ihe uAkuda 4h iredd it Join

FINALLY! The dark truth behind database operations is EXPOSED! 🚨 While professors feed us the sanitized "CRUD" acronym (Create, Retrieve, Update, Delete) like we're innocent children, real-world developers know it's actually "FUCK" (Find, Update, Create, Kill). The transition from classroom to cubicle is BRUTAL, sweetie. One day you're writing pristine SQL queries, the next you're frantically typing "DROP TABLE" at 2am while questioning your career choices. The database doesn't care about your feelings - it only understands violence. 💀

Content If you ever feel bad at CSS, remember that this is the website of the guy who created Python Guido van Rossum - Personal Home Page "crawn are prong onin" WRO LAI Read my "King's Dav speech" for some inspiration am the author of the Ruthon programmins language. See also mv resume and my publications list. a brief bio. assorted writings. presentations and interviews (all about Fvthon) some Dictures of me. my new blog, and mv old blog on Artima.com. I am gvanrossum on I Witte worked for Dropbox. Google. Blemental Securitv. Zop e Corporation BeOpen. com. CNRI. CWI. and SARA. (See my resume.) I created Python while at CWI How to Reach Me MY Name My name often poses difficulties for America Here's a collection of essavs relating to Pvthon that I've written, including the foreword I wrote for Mark Lutz' book "Programming Pvthon". The Andio File Formats FAQ I was the original creator and maintainer of the Audio File Formats FAQ. It is now maintained by Chris Bagwell at http:www.cnpbagwell.comaudio-faq. And here is a link to SOX, to which I contributed some early cod

Content YAskReddit US-Eleni 12h After you die, you get access to a database with all the information ever known or collected throughout human history. What do you search for first? Discussion 4.5k I 2.0k Share ? BEST COMMENTS Nicoletree 11h 1 Award Find out what database software they use, how much data they have, and begin looking at the table structure and relationships. 4) Reply 1.4k J jeremv1015 6h Plot twist: It's Mongo and the entirety of human history is stored in a single JSON obiect. The top level is a kev called "events" and the value is an unsorted arrav. 4 217 JuniorSeniorTrainee 3h Turns out god is a really nervous DB admin waiting for the inevitable. All the Apocalypse stuff in the Bible was actuallv iust a misunderstanding of him saying "Guvs vou don't get it, I literally built this shit in seven davs when I probablv should've spent vears on it. But management was pressuring me to deliver in seven davs so I had to hack together this garbage and it will definitely break anv minute now. 1 159 Ar4n 2h Mistranslation in the Bible. On the 7th day he tested.

Content Based on a true story: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help" "trouble" "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling wellgonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew . Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half- caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht l'm keeping those