Programmer 
Content
Look, if you had – one shot. One epic SQL query – to select everything you ever wanted – in one statement. Would you execute it or just let it slip? SELECT palms AS sweaty, knees AS weak, arms AS heavy, MAX(vomit) OVER (PARTITION BY sweater, already, momsspaghetti) AS nervous, CASE WHEN onthesurface THEN ‘looks calm and ready’ ELSE ‘drop bombs’ END AS keepsonforgetting, whathewrotedown, crowd AS loud, CASE WHEN mouth ‘open’ AND words IS NULL THEN ‘choking’ WHEN everyone ‘joking’ AND clock ‘run out’ AND time ‘Up’ THEN ‘over’ ELSE bloah END, snap, back FROM reality;