Excel Is My Database

That moment when you run a DELETE query without a WHERE clause and suddenly your database is having an existential crisis. Four million rows just vanished faster than my will to live during a production outage. Pour one out for all those database entries that never got to fulfill their destiny. They were just innocent bits and bytes with dreams of being queried someday. The real tragedy? The backup from last night is corrupted. Time to update that resume.

The duality of development in one perfect image! Frontend work is like a peaceful day in the meadow—just you and some cute components playing in the sunshine. Then there's backend development... suddenly you're in a post-apocalyptic hellscape with mutant data structures trying to eat your face off while everything burns around you. Yet somehow you're still expected to cradle that same codebase with the same gentle care. The glasses getting knocked off is the chef's kiss—that's your sanity leaving the chat when you realize your database just went nuclear.

Content Kya yaar ljyoshnapujhari Jun 2 Give me 3words.. better than I love you?? 888 17 23 667 Programmer Gaurav ProgrammerGRG : 17h Code Compiled Successfully! 17

Content JUSTUSE RAW SOL NOIYOU NEED TO USE AN ORM, GREATE A LOT OF COMPLEXITY, USE A WEIRD QUERY BUILDER, CREATE INEFFICIENT QUERIES AND IN THE 149END, USE RAW SOL ON IT 14 AUSTUSE RAW SOL 0.1 10 score 55 2 2 0.1 70 85 100 115 130 145

Content STOP USING DATABASES Data storage was not supposed to be serialized YEARS OF COLLECTION yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for going higher than a VECTOR Wanted to go higher anyway for a laugh? We had a tool for that: It was called EXCEL "Yes please START TRANSACTION. Please use PREPARED STATEMENTS." - Statements dreamed up by the utterly deranged LOOK at what CS engineers have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all libraries and languages we built for them (This is REAL MySQL, done by REAL data scientists) ????? ??????? ????????????????? "Hello I would like ';DROP TABLE users;-- please" They have played us for absolute fools

Content YAskReddit S Eleni 12h After you die, you get access to a database with all the information ever known or collected throughout human history. What do you search for first? Discussion 2.Ok Share BEST COMMENTS NicNoletree 11h 1 Award Find out what database software they use, how much data they have, and begin looking at the table structure and relationships. Reply 1.4k jeremy1015 - 6h Plot twist: It's Mongo and the entirety of human history is stored in a single JSON object. The top level is a key called "events" and the value is an unsorted array. 217 Junior Senior Trainee 3h Turns out god is a really nervous DB admin waiting for the inevitable. All the Apocalypse stuff in the Bible was actually just a misunderstanding of him saying "Guys you don't get it, I literally built this shit in seven days when I probably should've spent years on it. But management was pressuring me to deliver in seven days so I had to hack together this garbage and it will definitely break any minute now. 4 159 Ar4n 2h Mistranslation in the Bible. On the 7th day he tested.