Is It All C? (Always Has Been)

The cosmic joke of software development revealed! Astronauts floating in space discover that beneath all those fancy programming languages (JavaScript, Python, PHP, Java, C++, Ruby, Swift) lies the humble C language powering everything. It's like finding out your sophisticated smartphone runs on hamster wheels. No matter how high-level and abstracted your code gets, you're still standing on the shoulders of that 50-year-old C giant, frantically manipulating memory addresses and forgetting to free your pointers. The "Always has been" punchline is perfect - seasoned developers nodding knowingly while junior devs have their existential crisis in real-time. Your React app? C underneath. Your ML model? C underneath. Your entire career? Just elaborately disguised C code.

The great Rust migration aftermath – where your perfectly functional C++ codebase transforms into a post-apocalyptic wasteland of broken parts. That moment when you stare at the carnage thinking, "But the Reddit thread said it would be memory-safe ." Meanwhile, your deadline was yesterday, your boss is questioning your life choices, and somewhere a Rust evangelist is typing "you probably just didn't understand the borrow checker" on a forum. Sure, no more segfaults... because nothing runs at all. Progress!

Oh the beautiful abomination of mixing Python with C++ syntax! This code is the programming equivalent of putting pineapple on pizza AND dipping it in chocolate sauce. The madlad imported iostream in Python and then used C++'s cout << syntax inside a Python function. The most cursed part? It actually works! The terminal shows the output "Hello" because Python's flexible import system let this crime against nature run successfully. This is what happens when you know too many languages and decide to play god with syntax. Your code reviewer is probably having a seizure right now.

The first two panels show our protagonist happily accepting normal entry point functions in Rust and C/C++. "Yeah, that makes sense!" she cheerfully exclaims. Then panel three hits with Python's bizarre if __name__ == '__main__': pattern - the cursed incantation every Python dev has blindly copy-pasted a thousand times without questioning why we need this arcane check just to run a damn script. And that final panel? Pure existential horror. Seven years into my career and I still type this abomination with muscle memory while silently wondering who hurt the Python designers.

One brave Rust enthusiast standing alone against the massive horde of C and C++ programmers, boldly declaring "Yes, you all are wrong." It's basically the programming language equivalent of bringing a memory-safe knife to a buffer overflow gunfight. The audacity! The sheer confidence of that one Rust dev thinking their fancy ownership model and zero-cost abstractions will convince thousands of battle-hardened pointer-arithmetic veterans who've been manually managing memory since before Rust was a speck of oxidation on Graydon Hoare's keyboard.

The paranoia is real. Nothing says "trust issues" like wrapping your calculator in parentheses just to make absolutely sure it calculates 2+3*4 as 2+(3*4) instead of (2+3)*4. That's the difference between getting 14 and 20, and I'm not taking any chances with my code logic. The calculator says it follows PEMDAS, but do I believe it? Absolutely not. Those extra parentheses are basically the programming equivalent of wearing both a belt AND suspenders.