Old Man Yells At AWS

Content What are the 7 deadly sins of programming? John Purcell. Creator of CaveOfProgramming.com Updated Dec 2, 2017 Upvoted by Les Howie, Software professional for 40 years. and Hasib Al Muhaimin, IOl participant '13, '14, '15, ACM-ICPC World Finalist 2016 Author has 5.9k answers and 9.3m answer views 1. Using spaces instead of tabs. You should always, always use tabs, not spaces. 2. Using tabs instead of spaces. You should always, always use spaces, not tabs. 3. Not using auto-formatting. Forget all that tabsspaces rubbish, what's wrong with you - auto-format your code and then people won't have to look at vour weird ideas about brackets and spaces. 4. Using IDEs, which have features such as auto-formatting and nicely- coloured buttons. All code should be written in vi or Emacs, thus ensuring the purity of the programming experience. 5. Not using IDEs. No-one wants to pay for all the time it's going to take you to type things that you could have done at the click of a button, or scroll up and down using some ridiculous key combination invoked using LISP. 6. Failing to learn C and C. It's really important to learn the two absolute essential languages. You think Java is just as good? Fine, write me a real- time control system for racing cars in Java and I'll believe you. 7. Learning C or C when you could be using something modern like Java instead. Admit it - all your schedules involving C or C overrun by five years. And even then the software turns out to have critical flaws that Java would not even have allowed you to create. 8. Overrunning the end of an array. 356.1k views View 11.9k Upvoters View Sharers

The ultimate cloud hack: not using it at all! This dev's created a "Zero Cost Certificate" complete with defense strategies against AWS billing. The most bulletproof AWS architecture? Zero instances, zero services, zero dollars. My favorite part is threatening to show Bezos the screenshot if they dare charge a penny. Because nothing strikes fear into a trillion-dollar company like a strongly worded email and the promise to "speak to the manager." Pure financial genius! Bonus points for the "SQUEAKY CLEAN" account status. If only my code were that spotless.

Forget smoking and overpriced coffee - the real financial death spiral is forgetting about that EC2 instance you spun up "just to test something real quick." Nothing says "surprise bankruptcy" quite like getting that AWS bill showing you've been hosting the digital equivalent of an empty room for $200/day. The cloud giveth scalability, and the cloud taketh away your rent money. Next time you're debugging at 2 AM, set a calendar reminder titled "DO YOU WANT TO LIVE IN A CARDBOARD BOX?"

Content castservice stsiface alsstscreds elinepkgawsforecast elinepkgfaas ain.go:50:2: pp declared but not used jrm.buildstepfunction-deletedatasetgroup-8.8.1-2' setgroup-8.8.1-r272-4c6e9d.zip to s3:ssb-ingest-u parallel-forecasting 2 3 12 ?1 make bu -tags netgo -installsuffix netgo -o .build in-deletedatasetgroup-0.0.1-r272-f4c6e9d.zip .build

Content Require typing "permanently delete" to delete one file in a bucket Delete a whole CloudFormation stack in prod with one click

Top panel: "Oh look at my cute little website with its adorable traffic spike at 7pm!" Bottom panel: *Cold sweat intensifies* Someone's trying to access every single .env file, config, and AWS credential on your server. Nothing says "welcome to the internet" quite like watching hackers systematically probe your site's defenses while you realize your security is about as robust as a chocolate teapot. Pro tip: if your logs look like this, you're not having a website - a website is having you.