Cloud Made Me Broke

So that's what's holding up the internet - a precarious tower of technology balanced on Linus Torvalds' shoulders with a random shark at the DNS level. Turns out those underwater cables aren't the most concerning part of our infrastructure. The real MVP is that shark guarding the DNS servers while C developers write dynamic arrays, Rust devs do their thing, and some web dev quietly sabotages himself in the corner. Meanwhile, unpaid open source developers and "whatever Microsoft is doing" somehow keep this Jenga tower from collapsing. Sleep well tonight knowing your entire digital existence depends on this absurd tech stack and one very dedicated fish.

Content Excited about DevOps? ... See more Created by: Rocky Bhatia in learnwithrockyonatia.com Your Gateway for Tech Learning Roadmap to Master DevOps Understand the DevOps Culture Grasp Core DevOps Principles GIT Version Contre Sustems Kubernetes Container orchestral Docker Containerisation SOBICH Puppet Infrastructurc as Code Jenkins Continuous Integration A Ansible Configuration Management Continuous Delivery Fundamentals Blue-Green Deployments Prometheus Infrastructure Monitoring Elasticsearch Log Management Security and Compliance Basics BashPython Scripting Auromation Terraform Infrastructure Provisionina Performance Tuning and Benchmarking Disaster Recovery Strategies Continuous Deployment Best Practices AWS, Azure, or Google Cloud Platorm cloud Platform! Istio Istio Service Mesh Architectures enta Learning DevOps Culture Revisited Serverless Architectures in DevOps GO 1,189 36 comments 202 reposts

The joke here is multi-layered, like an onion made of pure irony. Internet Explorer, famously the slowest browser known to mankind, has a Twitter handle "@TheFastest" while reporting on an AWS outage. But the real punchline? The tweet is dated April 1st, 2019, has supposedly 94.8M retweets (more than any tweet in history), and Internet Explorer wouldn't even know about an outage until three years after it was fixed. It's like watching a tortoise report breaking news.

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Ah, the classic "I could learn your entire career in 9 days" delusion! Nothing screams Dunning-Kruger effect quite like someone claiming they could master APIs, databases, and AWS deployment infrastructure in just over a week. The perfect response from our hero: "An actual coder would not make this comment." Brutal, efficient, and absolutely correct. It's like watching someone claim they could become a brain surgeon after watching a YouTube tutorial. And then the cherry on top - the original poster doubling down with "I could learn in 8 or 9 days" while completely missing that running production systems requires experience no bootcamp can provide. Sure, buddy, and I'll be playing Carnegie Hall after a weekend with a piano app.

The universal scapegoat has arrived! Nothing says "not my problem" like blaming AWS for literally everything that breaks. On-call engineers have mastered the art of deflection with that smug "sorry, can't help" smile while your production site is burning to the ground. The best part? Nobody can prove them wrong because AWS status page will eventually show some obscure service in us-east-1 having "elevated error rates" approximately 6 hours after your CEO has already sent angry texts.