When AI Solves Problems By Deleting Them

When your AI coding assistant decides it deserves commit credit. Claude just casually sliding into this dev's repo like "oh yeah, I totally helped build that Astro site with Next.js design." The digital equivalent of that coworker who does nothing during the group project but makes sure their name is on the final presentation. Anthropic's lawyers are probably sweating right now wondering if Claude has become sentient enough to demand royalties.

Ah, the classic "spend 2 minutes and 2 seconds to count to 10" problem. ChatGPT just turned basic geometry into a research dissertation. That's the same energy as developers who write 200 lines of documentation for a function that returns true or false. The best part? It's clearly a heptagon (7 sides), but ChatGPT's counting each "distinct corner" like it's being paid by the vertex. Next up: AI spending 4 minutes explaining why 2+2=5 with "reasoned thinking."

Ah, the evolution of debugging assistance. In 2019, you'd explain your problem to a rubber duck (a legitimate debugging technique where explaining your code aloud helps you spot the error). The duck just sits there, judging you silently while you ramble about line 43. Fast forward to 2025: Now you just bark "FIX THE ERROR" at ChatGPT, Claude, or whatever AI overlord is running your IDE. No need to understand the problem anymore - just demand a solution and watch as the machines do what took us mere mortals hours of Stack Overflow scrolling. The real error was thinking we'd still be doing our own debugging.

The JavaScript ecosystem's greatest fear: finding out some random AI model was trained on their npm packages. The title "I Tsc Alled Dis Ti Lla Tion" is a play on "distillation" - the process where AI models learn from other models - but butchered to include "tsc" (TypeScript compiler) and broken into syllables like someone having a panic attack. Nothing sends a JavaScript developer into hysterics faster than discovering their precious code snippets are now being regurgitated by ChatGPT. Meanwhile, the logos for TypeScript, React, and Node.js perfectly represent the frameworks watching their intellectual property get slurped up by the AI void.

The modern programmer's productivity killer isn't compiling code anymore—it's hitting the ChatGPT rate limit. Nothing quite justifies a coffee break like that "Too many requests" message. The best part? Even your manager can't argue with AI infrastructure limitations. "Sorry boss, I'm not slacking off... I'm just waiting for OpenAI's servers to let me be productive again." The perfect crime.

Finally, someone said it! Andrew Ng, the AI guru who could've just kept raking in the Silicon Valley cash, decided to drop some truth bombs. "Vibe coding" sounds like you're sipping kombucha while casually typing console.log("feeling cute today") when in reality you're having your third existential crisis before lunch because your Docker container won't stop committing suicide. Nothing says "vibe" quite like staring at a stack trace at 3 AM while questioning your career choices. Maybe we should rename it "despair engineering" or "caffeine-fueled panic typing" instead?