The Heresy Of Manual Coding

OMG, venture capitalists are LITERALLY WORSHIPPING autocomplete now! 😱 Silicon Valley VCs seeing predictive text and immediately falling to their knees like they've witnessed the second coming. "Look! It finished my sentence! TAKE MY MILLIONS!" Meanwhile, actual engineers are in the corner having existential crises watching investors throw cash at glorified pattern recognition. The bar for "revolutionary technology" has fallen so low you could trip over it while scrolling through TikTok. And yet here we are, watching the money people treat basic AI features like they've discovered fire. PEAK COMEDY.

The only difference between AI consultants and LLMs is that one costs $300/hour. Both will confidently hallucinate a solution to your problem using words nobody understands, then gaslight you when it doesn't work. At least the LLM admits it's not sentient... yet.

Behold the classic AI career trajectory: from explaining neural networks to explaining why you dropped out of your PhD. Nothing says "I've mastered gradient descent" quite like watching your academic aspirations descend into the local minimum of content creation. The real algorithm here is simple: views = (technical knowledge) × (decolletage) / (academic integrity). Meanwhile, my GitHub contributions remain at zero while my student loans continue compounding interest faster than my code compiles.

The cosmic horror of GPU shopping in 2024! Our hero tries to negotiate for a graphics card, but the seller (standing in for Galactus, devourer of worlds... and wallets) has demands that strike fear into the hearts of budget-conscious developers everywhere: 12GB Budget GPUs. The punchline hits harder than a memory leak in production—there's nothing "budget" about these cards anymore! What used to cost a reasonable sum now requires sacrificing your firstborn and possibly a kidney. The shocked faces in the audience perfectly capture every developer trying to build a decent machine for ML training without selling vital organs.

The second you mention you're learning to code, every relative suddenly transforms into Usain Bolt chasing you down with AI course recommendations. Nothing says "supportive family" like implying your freshly-learned print("Hello World") is already obsolete before you've even figured out how loops work. The programming journey: 10% learning syntax, 90% sprinting away from people telling you that what you're learning is already outdated. Pro tip: develop selective hearing - it's the most valuable skill in your coding toolkit.

Oh. My. GOD! The absolute DRAMA of people with zero AI knowledge screeching about robot overlords while actual neural networks are over here labeling cats as dogs! 💀 The existential threat of AI is apparently a computer that can't tell the difference between basic pets! World domination? Honey, it can't even master a preschool-level animal identification task! Skynet isn't happening when your fancy algorithm thinks fluffy white cats are canines. But sure, keep panicking about the robot apocalypse while developers are just trying to make their models recognize basic objects correctly!