Some People Just Want To Watch The World Burn

Content Fullstack developer requirements: let releaseDates javascript: new Date( 'December 4, 1995"), angular: new Date( 'September 14, 2016'), python: new Date( 'February 20, 1991'), sql: new Date('1979'), function getYearsSinceRelease( releaseDate) let today new Date() let timeDiff today. getTime() - releaseDate.getTime() let yearsDiff Math. floor(timeDiff (1000 60 60 24 365)) return yearsDiff for (let key in releaseDates) console. log( - getYearsSinceRelease(releaseDates key) 1 years of experience with key Output: - 29 years of experience with javascript - 8 years of experience with angular 33 years of experience with python 46 years of experience with sql

Content Imperative Uses sed, awk, grep... 3 character ong variabale names "OOP Is literally Hitler" Never bashes Python or Javascripts proudly uses goo TOSern Doesn care what os or editor hers His main machine happens to be a 2013 Macbook war he god as a girl Functional el tit Watches Computerphile, thinks it's "Monad good" " azv evaluation good" "Loop bad" "Matato bade "Imperative not elegant" Rosoonsiblo for Mines of codesin oroduccion Uses Enacs with a light theme on an old Debian machine Uses software written by imperatave sconeager 00P boilerplate Has job consists of writing the boilerplate code day and he LOVES matches Bob Martin thinks the guy 1s a genUs "Oh, I need an object for this of ontar let me make a class rea auck to anticipate a the possible scenarios I may or may nor encoln Responsible for 95 of all lines of code in the world Uses JetBrains IDEs on mindows Uses boated proorietary software Safety- "Rust will replace C and C4 Always includes section in "Meres this awesone PR. bro, replaces your unsate code with AnGi but safe codo ho suppors for macOS, but writes an to back an installation on windous Best he's ever acconolished is writing a colored version of cat SCIMSTRET Mechanical kevboard -inch monitor no zoom when he screencasts kys it you can't see

Ah, the eternal Python vs "real programming" debate! The stick figure is lamenting that Python doesn't make you "cool like a real programmer" while his friends completely ignore him—one's jamming on a guitar, another's coding import numpy as np , and the third is actually building something useful. This perfectly skewers the gatekeeping mindset that equates programming difficulty with value. Meanwhile, the Python user is quietly being productive with scientific computing libraries while the purist is stuck complaining about language superiority. The irony is delicious—the person claiming others aren't "real programmers" is the only one not creating anything!

Content Programmers testing their code every 2 seconds so they can slack off while it's compiling:

OH. MY. GOD. This is the WORST coding advice since someone told me to delete System32 to speed up my computer! 🙄 Four spaces for imports?! FOUR?! Are you TRYING to trigger every Python developer's PEP 8 compliance alarm?! The Python style guide SPECIFICALLY says imports should be at module level with NO INDENTATION! This is the coding equivalent of putting pineapple on pizza and calling it "authentic Italian cuisine." I can't even! My eye is literally twitching right now. Someone please revoke this man's programming license IMMEDIATELY!

Content Is Your Child Texting About Programming Languages? What your C obsessed teen's texts actually mean omg - one more generic wtf -wheres the function fml - for my loop idfc indentation doesn't feel correct lol - logic on loop aka - abhorrent kafkaesque arithmetic rofl - right-oriented frame layout imo - iteration may overload stfu - statically typed feels unwise brb - bad recursion brb