There Is No Come Back From That Point

The Nobel Committee turning its back on actual computer science to ogle traditional physics is the academic equivalent of your crush ignoring your perfectly engineered app to date someone who can explain why apples fall from trees. Quantum computing? Machine learning breakthroughs? Nah, let's give another medal to someone who found a slightly different way to measure gravity. Meanwhile, the folks revolutionizing how we process information are left swiping through job postings that require "5+ years experience in a framework released last Tuesday."

Remember when programmers were basically coding demigods who could bend computers to their will? Now we're just sad creatures Googling "how to center div" for the 500th time and begging AI to fix our mistakes. The golden age programmer wrote code without StackOverflow, crafted entire games in Assembly (you know, that language that makes you want to cry), manually fixed memory leaks with pointers, and literally hand-coded the software that put humans on the freaking moon. Meanwhile, modern programmers are trapped in Vim wondering why :q doesn't work, fixing one bug only to create three more like some kind of hydra nightmare, and asking ChatGPT to solve problems we should probably understand ourselves. The decline is real, folks. But hey, at least we have dark mode now.

Remember when we thought we'd train AI to help us write code? Top panel: cute little AI cub learning from the wise software engineer master. Bottom panel: six months later, that same AI has evolved into a towering beast while we're still sitting there with our legacy code knowledge from 2019. The career progression timeline has been dramatically compressed. Took me 15 years to become a tech lead. Took AI about 15 minutes to make half my StackOverflow contributions irrelevant. But hey, at least I still know how to exit Vim. For now.

When the CAPTCHA goes from "select all traffic lights" to a full-blown biology exam. Those duck feet at the top and nine different animals below? Clearly designed by a sadistic backend dev who got rejected by a UI designer. The real Turing test here is figuring out if you're supposed to click on birds, cats, or just give up and accept that bots have better animal anatomy knowledge than humans. Next they'll ask us to identify which semicolon is missing from a screenshot of 500 lines of JavaScript.

Autocomplete tools looking at your code like pawn shop owners evaluating your junk. "Best we can do is predict next token" is the programming equivalent of "I'll give you $5 for that family heirloom." Sure, GitHub Copilot might suggest something brilliant, but usually it's just confidently predicting you want another semicolon or closing bracket. The AI revolution in coding is basically just sophisticated guesswork with better marketing.

Backend devs suddenly thrust into frontend work is like watching a fish try to climb a tree. The meme perfectly captures that moment when your React-allergic backend colleague has to touch CSS while the frontend dev is sipping margaritas on vacation. Meanwhile, they're also dealing with ChatGPT generating components that look functional but are secretly held together with digital duct tape. The face of pure existential dread says it all - "I didn't sign up for this flex-box nightmare!"