My Company Trying To Make Us Use ML

Left guy's in denial about AI coding tools while right guy's already seen the git blame logs from the future. The eternal cycle continues: new tech emerges, developers panic, then end up maintaining the mess it creates. The only constant in programming is cleaning up after the latest "revolutionary" tool. Just wait until we're all writing prompts to fix the prompts that fixed the code that broke the system.

Behold the classic AI career trajectory: from explaining neural networks to explaining why you dropped out of your PhD. Nothing says "I've mastered gradient descent" quite like watching your academic aspirations descend into the local minimum of content creation. The real algorithm here is simple: views = (technical knowledge) × (decolletage) / (academic integrity). Meanwhile, my GitHub contributions remain at zero while my student loans continue compounding interest faster than my code compiles.

Ah, the classic "sleeping peacefully until cloud costs jolt you awake" nightmare! This cat sleeps through earthquakes, thunderstorms, and even alien attacks, but shoots wide awake in pure terror when remembering there's a forgotten cloud instance still running somewhere, silently draining your bank account at $0.25/hour. Nothing triggers fight-or-flight response in a developer quite like realizing you spun up that "temporary" GPU instance three weeks ago and forgot to shut it down. That sudden 3am realization is scarier than any horror movie!

Oh snap! ChatGPT out here teaching C programming like it's handing out candy! 🍬 The joke is that when someone says "ChatGPT is useful for beginners," ChatGPT responds with some hardcore C code using malloc() to allocate memory for a string. That's like saying "swimming is easy" and then throwing someone into the deep end with sharks! Memory management in C is basically the final boss of programming that makes grown developers cry. Nothing says "beginner-friendly" like manual memory allocation that can crash your entire system if you forget to free it later! 💀

When GitHub Copilot writes your resume for you and decides to include a confession. Nothing says "hire me" quite like letting your AI assistant admit you're "not a good programmer" right after listing all your skills. At least the Tab Accept button is right there to quickly embrace your new identity crisis.

The digital resistance has begun! This dev is proudly weaponizing their garbage code as a form of technological sabotage against AI overlords. By releasing horrific spaghetti code into the wild, they're essentially feeding poison to the machine learning models that scrape GitHub for training data. It's like deliberately contaminating the water supply, except the victims are neural networks and the poison is nested if-statements that go 17 levels deep. Chaotic evil programming at its finest!