The Scary Part

The circle of AI delegation is complete! Senior dev thinks they've discovered a brilliant management hack by treating juniors like neural networks and writing detailed prompts for them. Meanwhile, the junior is just copying those prompts straight into ChatGPT and letting the actual neural network do the work. It's basically prompt engineering inception - the senior dev is unknowingly prompt engineering for an AI through a human middleman who's adding zero value to the process. This is peak 2023 software development efficiency!

The sweet bliss of chaos delegation! Nothing says "not my problem anymore" like pushing an 8000-line code monstrosity to GitHub and immediately entering hibernation mode. Your colleagues will wake up to that absolute unit of a pull request while you're dreaming peacefully, completely disconnected from the impending code review apocalypse. The perfect crime doesn't exi— Meanwhile, when someone else does this to you, it's suddenly a war crime worthy of The Hague. Funny how that works.

The ultimate revenge plot unfolds! When your ex becomes a QA tester at your company, suddenly every semicolon, variable name, and edge case becomes a personal vendetta. That code you wrote at 3 AM after four energy drinks? Yeah, she's going to find all the bugs you hoped no one would notice. Your commit history is about to become evidence in the trial of "I Told You You Never Pay Attention To Details." The relationship might be over, but the code reviews? Those are just beginning. Hope you enjoy explaining your spaghetti code architecture to someone who already knows all your weaknesses!

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute CIRCUS of modern tech work! 🤡 You've got all the skills, equipment, and internet connection to code from the comfort of your home, but NOOOOO! Some micromanaging dinosaur decides your productivity is directly proportional to how miserable your commute is! So here you are, dressed for the part you're forced to play in this corporate carnival, silently screaming inside while typing the EXACT SAME CODE you could've written in your pajamas! The rainbow wig really brings out the absurdity of sitting in a cubicle doing a job that literally requires nothing but a laptop and functioning brain cells. Pure. Comedy. TRAGEDY. 💀

OH. MY. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of that guy who quit last week! "It's all in the documentation," he said with a straight face while leaving us with what appears to be LITERAL HIEROGLYPHICS! 🙄 You know what's worse than no documentation? Documentation that requires a PhD in Ancient Egyptian Studies and a time machine! Like, sweetie, unless you're expecting us to hire the ghost of Indiana Jones as a consultant, maybe write something in ACTUAL ENGLISH next time? The rest of us are now stuck playing archaeological code detective, desperately trying to decipher if that bird symbol means "critical database function" or "I was bored on a Tuesday." Truly the ultimate revenge of a departed developer!

OH. MY. GOD. You thought submitting your PR was the hard part? SWEETIE, NO! 💅 Your code is about to face the FIRING SQUAD of senior developers who've been WAITING ALL DAY to tell you that your variable names are "problematic" and your indentation is a "crime against humanity." That shotgun isn't for show, honey! Your beautiful 3 AM code baby is about to be DISSECTED like a frog in biology class, except the frog is your self-esteem and the scalpel is Chad from Backend who "doesn't understand why anyone would implement it this way." Prepare for comments so passive-aggressive they could power a small nation!