Oh. My. GOD. The absolute TRAGEDY of software development methodologies laid bare! 😂
Waterfall is just straight-up DELUSIONAL - "Let's plan everything perfectly and then MAGICALLY end up on Mars!" Sure, Jan. 🙄
Agile is that friend who SWEARS they're going to Paris but ends up in their backyard. "We wanted Mars but settled for the Moon because REALITY HAPPENED, sweetie!"
Kanban? More like Can't-Ban the endless sticky notes! A YEAR later and you're still begging for armrests while drowning in tiny tasks. The AUDACITY!
Scrum is just organizational WHIPLASH. Disappear for a month, fail spectacularly, then have the NERVE to call a 15-minute meeting to start over? I'm DECEASED. ⚰️
And Lean Development? Honey, that's just poverty with WINGS ON A FIRECRACKER. The delusion of convincing investors that your dollar-store rocket might reach Mars "someday" is just *chef's kiss* PEAK STARTUP CULTURE.