Free Labor With A Side Of Competition

Ah, JavaScript's type coercion explained with toilet paper. Pure genius. Non-zero value: Has toilet paper. Works as expected. 0: Empty roll but still there. Technically exists but utterly useless. null: Just the holder. Someone deliberately removed the toilet paper. undefined: No toilet paper holder at all. Whoever built this bathroom forgot a critical component. And yet somehow all of these evaluate to false in an if statement. JavaScript, where the rules are made up and the types don't matter.

The eternal JavaScript framework cycle in one perfect image! Three scientists examining a rocket blueprint while standing next to an actual janky rocket made of paper and traffic cones. The disconnect between what we think we're building ("MY JS FRAMEWORK") versus what we actually are ("SOFTWARE ENGINEERS") is *chef's kiss*. Every six months some genius cobbles together a new JS framework held together with duct tape and promises, convincing themselves they're rocket scientists revolutionizing web development. Meanwhile, actual computer scientists are laughing their PhDs off watching us reinvent the wheel with increasingly elaborate names.

The perfect self-burn doesn't exi— Oh wait, here it is! Reddit suggesting r/Rust is "Similar to r/ProgrammerHumor" while someone declares "Goodbye, C++. Rust is the future." is peak irony. The title "Both Subs Are For Jokes" is the chef's kiss - implying that Rust evangelism and programming humor are basically the same thing. Nothing says "I'm a serious developer" like religiously announcing the death of established languages. Memory safety or memory insanity? The line blurs when the Rust cult assembles.

The evolution of software engineering in its natural habitat! First, we have the innocent "Software Engineer" - just a regular Pooh bear doing honest work. Then there's the slightly pretentious "Sr Software Engineer" - same bear, just wearing a tux and acting fancy because they learned what a design pattern is. But the final form? The "pRoMpt eNgiNeEr" with that cursed ransom-note typography - it's just a deranged panda typing "make me a website that looks like Amazon but better" into ChatGPT and calling it coding. The tech industry's equivalent of ordering a pizza and claiming you made dinner.

You start the "30 Days of JavaScript" challenge with such hope and optimism. "I'll finally master JS," you tell yourself. Fast forward to day 30, and you're a broken shell of a developer questioning every life choice that led you to this point. The callback hell, the prototype inheritance, the "this" keyword changing context like your ex changes their mind. JavaScript doesn't teach you code—it teaches you pain .

Kid writes to Santa: "Dear Santa I want to create an operating system using HTML." Santa's immediate reaction is to sneak in and smother the child with a pillow. Mercy killing. Some crimes against computer science can't be forgiven. Next he'll be asking for a database built with CSS.