When QA Begins Testing The Feature You Shipped

When your bank is clearly run by developers who forgot to replace placeholder values. "Your null has been shipped" is what happens when someone's database query fails silently and the template just rolls with it. That poor null value is now traveling through the postal system, desperately searching for the address they have "on file." Good luck tracking that card—it exists in the void between undefined and non-existent. At least they were kind enough to let you know about their spectacular failure!

Content When your code runs without error the first time: inace with Something's wrong, I can feel it ProarammerHumor.io

The emotional rollercoaster of CI pipeline debugging, captured in git commit history. From the initial "fuck yeah, finally got it!!!" celebration to the soul-crushing "once again" failures, followed by increasingly desperate pleas to the CI gods. The gradual descent from confidence to begging is painfully familiar to anyone who's battled flaky tests. That special moment when you go from "fix: Come on, CI!" to "fix: Getting pretty angry at CI by now..." is when you know you've entered the seventh circle of DevOps hell.

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Content 10 WAYS TO TROLL YOUR DEVELOPER 1: CHANGE ALL CONSOLE SETTINGS TO BLACK ON BLACK. STRANGE... NO DEBUG PRINTOUTS 2: HAVE THEM FIX OLD CODE. 3: REQUIRE IT TO WORK ON ALL PLATFORMS. IT WILL HAVE TORUN ON IOS, ANDROID, WINDOWS PHONE AND THIS ROTARY FROM 1931. 4: HIRE UNQUALIFIED DEVELOPERS. CHAD WILLBE DOING UI. 5: DISREGARD ANY NEED FOR TESTING. A TESTING PHASE ISN'T REALLY IN THE BUDGET IT'S JUST GONNA HAVE TO WORK 6: REQUIRE IT TO WORK FOR ALL USER GROUPS. MR. NIBBLES SAID ITS VERY UNINTUITIVE. MEOW. 7: POP YOUR HEAD IN EVERY FIVE MINUTES TOROND OVER YOUR STUPID COWORKERS SHARON USES A QUESTION MARK WHEN SHE GOOGLES A QUESTIONI 8: BLOCK ALL ACCESS TO STACK OVERFLOW. NOW, NOW, NO CHEATING CELO 9: MAKE ALL TASKS TOP PRIORITY. THE DATABASE NEEDS TO BEUP AND RUNNING ASAP, AS WELL AS THE AUDIO ENGINE, CRITICAL AND ALSO 3D BUTTON SHADING. 10:ASK A DEV TO 'FIX YOUR COMPUTER' MR. NIBBLES WAS WATCHING GOOD WIFE AND SUDDENLY THIS BLUE THINGY CAME War and Peas

Content JUNIOR COMPILE O WARNING DERROR COMPILE 120 WARNING 50 ERROR SENIOR COMPILE 120 WARNING 50 ERROR COMPILE OWARNING DERROR