What Is The πthon Executable?

Content MIT Confessions 2 hrs S id Like Page 23582 To all the people who use Python 2, FUCKING STOP. Its fucking outdated. You don't see anyone running around MIT being RACIST because guess what, RACISM IS ALSO OUTDATED. SO WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU USING PYTHON 2 YOU RACIST. 80: 80 29 Comments 2 Shares ( Like Comment Share

Oh. My. GOD! The absolute TRAGEDY of modern development in one perfect image! 😭 On the left, we have the GLORIOUS CHAD DEVELOPERS of yesteryear who, when faced with limitations, didn't whine about it - they just casually BUILT THEIR OWN OPERATING SYSTEM WITH THEIR OWN LANGUAGE like it was just another Tuesday afternoon hobby! And then there's us... the pathetic creatures of today, sobbing into our Stack Overflow searches, unable to remember the syntax for a basic if statement in Python (which is literally just "if condition:"). The sheer AUDACITY of comparing these two specimens! I'm having an existential crisis just looking at this!

Why spend hours implementing a Least Recently Used cache algorithm when someone else already did the hard work? Modern problems require modern solutions - specifically, the import statement. The face says it all: "You want me to reinvent the wheel? In this economy?" Nothing captures the essence of professional development quite like knowing when to code and when to leverage existing libraries. Work smarter, not harder... unless it's an interview, then pretend you'd totally write it from scratch at work.

Content Hacker Scripts Based on a true story: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling wellgonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (I) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht I'm keeping those

Content Oh, wow! Haircuts Hey! Off reuts What! This is going to take FOREVER. ruts http:www.JoeGP.com

Content funky lesbean trans disaster STOP ARGUING OVER THE BEST PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE C is LOW-LEVEL C is POWERFUL Python is INTUITIVE Rust is SAFE Lua is EASY Java C is LEGIBLE