The Real Software Development Lifecycle

Content Virgin Python programmer Doesn't know what a pointer is Can't make apps for phones Only watches YouTube tutorials. Hasn't read a programming textbook in his life His programs are slow The Chad CC programmer Very attractive to women. "C" stands for "Chad" His machine learning algorithm learns 4 times faster than Virgin's Works for Google The Thad Assembly Programmer At hist (TYCOONS Dungeon Master Great sense of style His programs can run on a toaster Probably speaks Klingon The Lad Logic gate programmer Makes redstone computers in Minecraft. Made these goggles himself Realitv can be whatever he wants Vitamin D deficient

Content Marko 4 Denic denicmarko STOP making fun of different programming languages C is FAST Java is POPULAR Ruby is COOL Python is BEAUTIFUL PHP JavaScript is AWESOME Haskell is INTRIGUING 17:12 07 May 20 Twitter Web App

The eternal Python vs C++ showdown in its purest form. Python programmers strutting around claiming they can solve everything "in just 3 lines of code" while the buff, battle-hardened C++ programmer silently watches knowing those 3 lines are calling libraries that took thousands of lines of C++ to implement. Sure, you can one-liner your way through a problem with Python's abstractions, but somewhere a C++ dev is manually managing memory and optimizing assembly just so you can feel clever about your list comprehensions. It's the programming equivalent of taking credit for cooking dinner when you just ordered takeout.

The duality of programmer tribalism in its natural habitat! Notice how devs will respectfully kneel in solidarity when someone trashes a language they don't care about. "Oh no! Anyway..." But criticize their precious language? Suddenly they're storming the Capitol of your Twitter thread with tactical keyboards and compiled arguments. "HOW DARE YOU SAY PYTHON IS SLOW? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I BUILT AN ENTIRE MICROSERVICE THAT RUNS IN JUST UNDER 17 MINUTES!" The language wars continue, and the only casualties are rational discussions and Stack Overflow comment sections.

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Content SOME INSECTS ARE SO STRONG. LOOK AT THIS BEETLE. HIS KIDS ARE "HTML PROGRAMMERS" BUT HE DOES NOT CRY. poorlydrawnlines.com