Today Will Be The Day You Will Always Remember As The Day, You Almost Understood My Code

Writing incomprehensible code isn't a bug—it's a feature. That senior dev who writes cryptic one-liners with zero comments? They're not sloppy; they're building their legend. Nothing says job security like being the only one who can decipher your own arcane syntax.

Sure, your code review might be a disaster, but at least they'll remember your name when the production server catches fire at 3 AM and you're the only one who can fix it. Infamous is still famous in git blame.