The Memories Of VB 6.0

Remember when LinkedIn was for humble-bragging about promotions? Now it's just watching your entire industry get Thanos-snapped in real time. Tech companies went from "We're disrupting the future!" to "We're disrupting your employment status!" faster than a poorly optimized query. The only thing growing faster than AI investments is the number of "open to work" profile badges. The worst part? Those same companies laying off thousands are posting record profits. Nothing says "strategic restructuring" like firing the entire engineering team that built your platform while the CEO buys another yacht.

Look at Perl over here with its revolutionary socialist programming syntax! While other languages force you into the capitalist nightmare of declaring variables with boring words like "public static int," Perl is out here throwing a LINGUISTIC REVOLUTION with "our $i = 1" like it's redistributing the wealth of syntax to the people! 💅 The absolute DRAMA of using "our" instead of "public" and that dollar sign before variables? It's giving communist manifesto but make it code. I simply cannot with how Perl decided to be the people's champion of variable declaration!

The first time you write code with emoji literals is like taking a cold shower for your programming principles. The snippet shows Python code checking if a reaction emoji matches a smiley face, and the programmer is having an existential crisis about it. That feeling when you break your "clean code" religion to parse Discord or Slack reactions and suddenly you're comparing string literals to "😀". It's syntactically valid but spiritually devastating. Your CS professor is crying somewhere and doesn't know why.

Content GOT FIRED VESTERDAY NO MORE PANIC ATTACKS FROM THE STRESS THAT JOB CAUSED ME

Content When you realize that jerk in the office does exclusively repetitive, scriptable tasks I'm about to eno is man's whole career

Content Developer: It works on my computer Product Manager: Yes, but we are not going to give your computer to the customer