The Great Conditional Popularity Contest

Content BJ Smith BJSmithArt 27m Why are IT guys such dicks? 9 7 Eric Chapman eschapman Replying to BJSmithArt Last week I drove two hours to push the power button on a server that three separate people assured me was already on.

The eternal programming adventure - you start coding with hope and optimism, then inevitably hit a bizarre bug. After hours of frustration, you find that exact bug described in a dusty StackOverflow thread from 2013. The question has 47 upvotes, 12 people commenting "I HAVE THIS EXACT PROBLEM!!!"... and zero answers. Just a tumbleweed rolling by and the original poster's final comment: "Nevermind, fixed it" with no explanation. The digital equivalent of finding an ancient treasure map with the actual treasure location torn off.

Content Python: What if everything was a dict? Java: What if everything was an object? JavaScript: What if everything was a dict and an object? C: What if everything was a pointer? APL: What if everything was an array? Tel: What if everything was a string? Prolog: What if everything was a term? LISP: What if everything was a pair? Scheme: What if everything was a function? Haskell: What if everything was a monad? Assembly: What if everything was a register? Cog: What if everything was a typeproposition? COBOL: WHAT IF EVERYTHING WAS UPPERCASE? C: What if everything was like Java, but different? Ruby: What if everything was monkey patched? Pascal: BEGIN What if everything was structured? END C: What if we added everything to the language? C11: What if we forgot to stop adding stuff? Rust: What if garbage collection didn't exist? Go: What if we tried designing C a second time? Perl: What if shell, sed, and awk were one language? Peri6: What if we took the joke too far? PHP: What if we wanted to make SQL injection easier? VB: What if we wanted to allow anyone to program? VB.NET: What if we wanted to stop them again? Forth: What if everything was a stack? ColorForth: What if the stack was green? PostScript: What if everything was printed at 600dpi? XSLT: What if everything was an XML element? Make: What if everything was a dependency? m4: What if everything was incomprehensibly quoted? Scala: What if Haskell ran on the JVM? Clojure: What if LISP ran on the JVM? Lua: What if game developers got tired of C? Mathematica: What if Stephen Wolfram invented everything? Malbolge: What if there is no god? nixcraft

The eternal struggle of developers: trying to Google technical terms that sound suspiciously like NSFW content. FFmpeg is just a powerful multimedia framework for processing video and audio—but good luck explaining that to your boss when they walk by and see "FF" in your search bar. The official FFmpeg account swooping in with a professional response is just *chef's kiss*. Next up: trying to explain why you're searching for "master/slave database configuration" to HR.

Content Senior in stand up Junior in stand up "I HAVE NOTHING DONE!!!!" " have very little done"

Content REMOTE WORKERS BEFORE CORONAVIRUS REMOTE WORKERS AFTER CORONA VIRUS You should comment your code more imgflir