The Best Words A Developer Can Hear

Content How Many Seconds Between Two Dates? 89 So I have two dates YYYY-MM-DD and ZZZZ-NN-EE How can I find out how many seconds there are between them? javascript date share edit time 13 asked Jan 7 '10 at 22:35 joes steven 2.953 11 30 38 97 I try to leave at least a half-hour between dates to keep from getting caught. - Don Branson Jan 7 '10 at 22:37

Content what's your job? i'm a programmer IsEven(int number) If (number 1) return false; (number 2) return true: (number 3) return false: (number 4) return true: (number 5) return false: (number 6) return true; (number as anD return false; (umber as 8) return true; (number 9) return false (number ze 169

Content serverless really is the future.... ddl ec2

Functional programming purists have gone too far! While we're all using CONST to make variables immutable, Haskell folks are over here with their monads, currying, and type signatures that look like hieroglyphics from an alien civilization. The beauty of this rant is that it perfectly captures the existential crisis of every developer who's peeked into Haskell's mathematical purity only to back away slowly. "Hello I would like [1,2...] apples please" - because apparently ordering groceries requires a PhD in category theory now. Those code snippets with question marks are the programming equivalent of opening a physics textbook to a random page and questioning your career choices. The mathematicians have indeed played us for absolute fools!

Content Problem: Stuck in mud, can't proceed. Obvious Solution Corporate Solution

Ah, the productivity paradox of modern development. Write a single line of code and suddenly your brain demands a two-hour reward break playing League of Legends. The mental gymnastics we perform to justify this is Olympic-level: "I deserve this," "I'm letting my subconscious work on the problem," or my personal favorite, "I'm researching user engagement patterns." Meanwhile, that one line of code is probably just a comment you'll delete tomorrow. The ultimate developer self-deception loop: minimal effort → maximum reward → crushing guilt → repeat.