Programmer 
Content
What to do when your Code is due in 30 Minutes and you were Procrastinating 1. First, take a deep breath. It’s going to be okay. 2. Next, find the strongest stimulant you can. Caffeine, nicotine, coke, whatever you can get your hands on. You’re gonna need all your neurons overcloocked for this one. 3. Try to find a fundamental flaw in the requirements that you can exploit. If all else fails, make something up. "The customer never specified that it had to be correct" is a personal favorite. 4. Start writing code. Any code. Just enough to believe vour own lies when vou tell vour boss about what a great job you did. 5. Realize that there’s no way you can finish in time or find an excuse good enough. So you might as well enter panic mode and accept your inevitable doom. Fuck.