Risk Memes

Posts tagged with Risk

The Danger Zone: FTP Straight To Production

The Danger Zone: FTP Straight To Production
While the cool kids flex their fancy CI/CD pipelines with automated tests and rollbacks, you're over here living dangerously with your IDE directly connected to production via FTP. That nervous sideways glance says it all – you know one wrong keystroke could bring down the entire system, but hey, it's not a bug, it's a feature! Who needs 12 deployment steps when you can just drag-and-drop straight to chaos? The digital equivalent of performing surgery with a chainsaw while blindfolded.

I Did The Thing

I Did The Thing
That rare moment of pride when you finally take the plunge and modify production code directly because "it's just a small fix." The formal announcement is necessary because you've spent years hearing "never touch prod" but here you are, living dangerously. Sure, you probably violated six company policies and bypassed three approval workflows, but hey—the customer's happy and nobody died! Let's just hope this doesn't become the first chapter in your upcoming book: "How I Learned to Update My Resume in a Hurry."

Table Stakes Are High With Migrations

Table Stakes Are High With Migrations
Running database migrations in production is like mid-air refueling—precision required, failure not an option, and everyone's holding their breath the entire time. One wrong move and your fighter jet (aka production database) crashes spectacularly into the ground while management watches in horror. And just like military operations, you'll find yourself saying a little prayer before hitting that "migrate" button, hoping your carefully crafted SQL doesn't turn your company's data into digital confetti. The stakes? Just your entire job and possibly the business itself. No pressure!

Not For The Faint Of Heart

Not For The Faint Of Heart
This meme perfectly captures the sheer terror of debugging in production. Just like this madman fixing an airplane engine while it's flying , developers often find themselves frantically patching critical bugs on live systems that can't be taken down. One wrong move and the whole thing crashes spectacularly! The difference? The plane mechanic only risks his life once, while developers experience this heart-stopping anxiety multiple times per sprint. And management still wonders why we need more coffee.