When Default Sort() Gets Awkward

Content One of the world's best snipers has arrived in Ukraine. The French-Canadian "Wali" from the Royal Canadian 22e Rgiment made his reputation during tours in Afghanistan, Syria and Iraq He fought in the same Canadian unit as the sniper with the world's longest kill (3.5 km) 3 0 9. 4 Awards i read that he became a computer scientist after his time in the service. that means he feels it's more morally correct to kill people than program Javascript Reply 4 5.1k J

Whoever wrote this switch statement clearly never heard of a HashMap. They're out here mapping Samsung Galaxy Buds models to their product codes like it's 1999. Instead of this monstrosity with 10+ case statements, they could've just done: const productCodes = {"Galaxy Buds FE": "R400XX", ...} and then return productCodes[var] || "default"; But hey, who needs elegant solutions when you can write code that scrolls for days? Bonus points for the completely random product codes that follow no logical pattern whatsoever. Samsung's engineers are probably the same people who name their variables a1, a2, a3...

Ah yes, the sacred transformation ritual. Buy a MacBook, read half of an O'Reilly book, and suddenly you're qualified to rewrite Google's codebase from scratch. The cartoon character's smug little face says it all – that special moment when you've learned just enough HTML to update your LinkedIn title to "Full Stack Engineer." Meanwhile, actual developers are crying in the corner with their decade of experience and impostor syndrome.

The ultimate LinkedIn tech bro wisdom has arrived! Nothing says "I'm disrupting the industry" like telling seasoned developers their decade of debugging nightmares is now obsolete because some AI can spit out half-baked code after being fed StackOverflow answers. The Kübler-Ross grief model for programmers is spot on though—we've moved from "AI will never replace us" to "WHY IS THIS CHATBOT WRITING BETTER REGEX THAN ME?!" in record time. My favorite part is the condescending "adapt or die" mentality from someone who probably thinks "fighting PHP demons" means they once had to center a div. Meanwhile, actual developers know AI is just another tool that generates bugs with unprecedented efficiency.

Content CATALIN PIT O catalinmpit If your job spec looks like this: HTML, CSS JavaScript, Python NodeJS, GraphQL React AWS Docker Jenkins, Drone Bash scripting Puppet Terraform Kubernetes MySQL, DynamoDB, MongoDB, Aurora You're looking for an entire IT department, not for a developer!

Content Hacker Scripts Based on a true story: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxX: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxX: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling wellgonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxX: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht I'm keeping those