ATTENTION PROGRAMMERS: Be sure to check your kid's candy carefully after Halloween. There can be recursions inside!

Content YOU'RE EATING RECURSION SAFELY ENDANGERED SWEET JESUS, POOH! THAT'S NOT HONEY SAFELY ENDANGERCO SWEET JESUS, POOH. THAT'S NOT HONEY 1W6T JESES PCOM YOU'RE EATING RECURSION

Content Backend developers: Frontend developers just coloring buttons Frontend developers: Backend developers just processing JSON Backend Developers:

Content I Spent a Week in the Forest Coding JavaScript. With No Electricity. Last week, I decided to take a break from the hustle of the city and go back to nature. I packed my bags and headed into the forest. I left my laptop at home. But I couldn't help myself - I brought pen and paper. And I'm glad I did, because I ended up spending the week coding JavaScript. I had to start from scratch, of course. I mean, there's no way I could have remembered all the APIs and libraries. But it was a great opportunity to really get back to basics and learn how everything works. That's why I decided to start my own business. If you're looking for a truly immersive coding experience, look no further! For just 999USD a week, I'll take you into the forest and teach you everything.

The infamous "sleep sort" algorithm—where your array gets sorted by setting timeouts based on each value. The smaller numbers wake up first, the bigger ones hit snooze longer. Technically it works (sort of), but try explaining this beauty in a coding interview and watch the interviewer's soul leave their body. "It's O(max(array)) time complexity, sir!" Absolute chaos masquerading as computer science. The perfect algorithm if your requirements include "must be completely unreliable" and "please never use in production."

Content This is a motherfucking website. And it's fucking perfect. Seriously, what the fuck else do you want? You probably build websites and think your shit is special. You think your 13 megabyte parallax-ative home page is going to get you some tUCKIng AWard Da1 mer vou can glue to the too corner of vOus 40-Dound 1Oue tile and 85 Do viiis give la a Done Shit's lightweight and loads fast Fits on all vour shitty screen Looks the same in all vour shitty browsers The mothertuckers accessible to every asshole that visits your site Shits legible and gets your fucking point across it you had one instead of just 5mb pics of hipsters drinking coffee Well guess what, mothertucKer: You. Are. Over-designing. Look at this shit. It's a motherfucking website. Why the fuck do vou need to animate a fucking trend-ass banner flag when I hover over that useless piece of shit? You spent hours on it and added 80 kilobvtes to vour fucking site. and some mothertucker jabbing at it on their 1Pad with fat sausage fingers will never see Not to mention blind people will never see that shit, they don't see any of you You never knew it, but this is your pertect website. Heres why. It's fucking lightweight This entire page weighs less than the gradient-meshed facebook logo on your fucking Wordpress site. Did you seriously load 100kb of Query UI iust so vou could animate the fucking backeround color of a div? You loaded all 7 fontfaces of a shitty webfont just so vou could say "Hi." at 100px height at the beginning of vour site? You piece of shit It's responsive You dumbass. You thought vou needed media queries to be responsive, but no. Responsive means that it responds to whatever mothertucking screensize its viewed on. This site doesnt care it youre on an iMac or a mothertucking lamagotchi It fucking works Look at this shit. You can read ; Courses I'm Currently Teaching (1995) Ithas content on the fucking ser Fall 1995 me click some bobbing button tr ILS tags nd make CS101: How to literally use for-loops CSSS9: You will seriously get rekt by this course dont take it Last edited: Sep. 29, 2016 Contact Information Phone: (333) 425-5253 Fax: (333) 888 - 3424 Email: john(at)university(dot)edu Oitice: Generic Hall. 41) M. N. Shamalayan M. N. Shamalayan. "Combining Neural Networks With Natural Language Processing to Optimize the Hitler Problem." (ICSE-1998). M. N. Shamalayan. "Using Unguided Prim 'Trees to Solve the Matrix Mul- tincation Problem" (OSS-2000 M. N. Shamalayan. Using Large Dataset Combined with Support Vector Machine to Solve the Ice-Cream Optimization Problem. (1051-2002)

Content : Anonymous 011424(Sun)00:30:43 No.98435111 OK let's learn C make a new project in visual studio turns out thats not the correct way to do it because then it's not cross platform and i can't switch editors 280 KB JPG later start learning make, realize it's a clusterfuck of retardation but somehow copy paste something together that compiles turns out it's not the correct way to do it, the "modern" way is that you need to use premake to generate make files which then generate the visual studio solution :) ok let's write code.. wait, i have to write header files? you mean i have to have double the code for no reason other than the C build system being garbage? i want to parse a small json config file, it doesnt have to be performant. wait, how the fuck do i add libraries to my project? ok, so i have to add them and update them manually like a caveman or i have to do some git submoduling cancer, or i can use this package manager called conan that doesn't work half the time. run program - crashes that's fine it happens during development all the time let's read the helpful error message and fix what we did wrong "an error has occured" ProdrammerHumor.io