Just Get A PC!

Oh snap! That "Memories" box isn't storing family photos—it's a treasure chest of ancient RAM sticks! 😂 This is peak geek nostalgia right here! Remember hoarding old computer parts because "they might be useful someday"? That box is basically a tech graveyard where DDR1 memory went to retire. The contrast between the cute floral box and the circuit boards inside is just *chef's kiss*. It's like finding dinosaur fossils except they're only from 2005 and cost $200 back then!

Nothing says "I've made terrible life choices" quite like debugging BIOS code at 3AM and suddenly realizing you're staring at a boot menu that says "Hard Dick Drive" instead of "Hard Disk Drive." The best part? This isn't even a typo you can blame on autocorrect. Some sleep-deprived firmware engineer had to manually code this masterpiece, then it passed through QA, got shipped to thousands of computers, and nobody noticed until users started giggling like 12-year-olds during system setup. Legacy hardware: where professionalism goes to die.

Trust issues level 9000! When someone asks why IT professionals are difficult, here's your answer: driving two hours just to physically verify a server is powered on despite THREE people's assurances. Because in the server room, "trust but verify" isn't just a motto—it's a survival mechanism. That blinking LED is worth more than any verbal confirmation. Remote management tools? Sure, they exist... but nothing beats the sweet relief of pressing that cold metal power button yourself and whispering, "I knew it" when you were right all along.

SWEET MOTHER OF STORAGE NIGHTMARES! Windows 11 on 45,686 floppy disks?! Just IMAGINE the absolute hellscape of sitting there, feeding disk after disk into your computer like some deranged digital hamster for what would literally be WEEKS of your life! You'd be gray-haired and developing carpal tunnel syndrome by disk 387, contemplating your life choices by disk 12,493, and probably dead of old age before you even reached the halfway point! And don't you DARE sneeze near disk 32,651 or you'll have to start ALL OVER AGAIN! Modern operating systems have gone from megabytes to gigabytes to "let's just consume your entire existence" bytes!

Ah, the Chrome trade agreement. Google's browser offers you the worst deal in the history of deals, possibly ever. You hand over 9.6GB of precious RAM and get... a single browser tab. Not even a whole browsing experience—just one lonely tab. The memory leak is so bad you could water plants with it. Meanwhile, your computer fans sound like they're preparing for takeoff while you're just trying to check the weather. And yet, here we are, still using it. Stockholm syndrome is real in tech.

The beauty of Linux in one rusty nutshell! While Windows users need a gaming rig with RGB lighting and liquid cooling just to run Chrome, Linux enthusiasts are out here running server clusters on hardware that survived the Chernobyl disaster. That's not a PC case—that's what we call "character." The best part? This bad boy probably still boots faster than Windows Update. If it can conduct electricity and you can compile a kernel on it, congratulations—you've exceeded the minimum requirements!