30 minutes of trying to fix something in CSS

The legendary Senior Developer—an armored knight impervious to the arrows of corporate chaos. While managers whine about velocity, customers rage, and deadlines whoosh by, this battle-hardened veteran just smiles and reassures the terrified Junior Dev that everything is fine. It's the tech industry's greatest illusion: pretending you're not being stabbed by a thousand project management arrows while mentoring someone who has no idea what fresh hell awaits them. That encouraging "Nice PR" is basically saying "Welcome to the thunderdome, kid—I've just grown numb to the pain."

Content Matt Watson 2nd 4x Founder, CTOCEO, Podcaster, .. Follow View my blog 3d "Technical debt": Move fast and don't fix things "Agile development": Admitting you have no plan "TDD": Guessing the future, one test at a time "Open source": Asking someone else to fix it "CICD: Automating your mistakes into production "API": Asking someone else to do it "DevOps": The belief that more tools fix any problem "Microservices: Creating enough small problems to avoid one big one "Cybersecurity": Playing hide and seek with hackers "Serverless": Pretending servers don't exist until the bill comes "Scrum": Group therapy for being behind schedule

Content You have a gf She likes coding She takes an interest in your work She helps you debug your code

Opera GX removed a literal egg from their codebase to save 18kb, then immediately put it back when users revolted. Somewhere, a product manager is explaining to executives why an image of breakfast food is a mission-critical feature. The most efficient code optimization would be deleting the entire browser, but then where would gamers get their RGB lighting?

Content My debugging skills print'lor") Made using MemeBoand.io

Functional programmers learning imperative languages: "Wait, I can just... print things? Without wrapping everything in an IO monad? This is amazing!" Imperative programmers learning functional languages: "So you're telling me I need to understand category theory just to debug with console.log? I studied computer science, not mathematics from the 1940s." The beautiful irony here is that the functional dev discovers the joy of side effects and mutable state like a kid in a candy store, while the imperative dev realizes that their trusty println() requires understanding functors, applicatives, and monadic composition. One person's "finally, simplicity!" is another person's existential crisis. Pro tip: If someone starts explaining monads using burrito analogies, just nod and go back to your print statements. You'll be fine.