When ChatGPT Is Your Entire Tech Stack

Machine learning engineer: "No, honey, they're just PyTorch and Keras model files." Non-technical partner: *suspicious squinting intensifies* Those file extensions (.pkl, .pt, .pth) are just serialized machine learning models. Though let's be honest, naming that folder "models" instead of "neural_networks" was a rookie mistake. Next time use something truly unsexy like "gradient_descent_checkpoints".

After 15 years of grinding out code, you're faced with two options: compete with the AI overlords who can write a full-stack app while you're still typing "import React," or just give it all up to grow potatoes. The sweaty panic attack is just the realization that both options are equally terrifying. At least the potatoes won't tell you your variable naming convention sucks.

The AI benchmarking cult strikes again! Everyone's obsessed with those radar charts comparing Large Language Models using some bizarre "ball turning test" metric that nobody actually understands. It's just a bunch of geometric shapes that supposedly prove one model is better than another. The joke here is that these comparison charts have become so ubiquitous in AI discussions that even though they're practically meaningless to most developers, everyone nods along pretending to understand what they're looking at. Classic tech impostor syndrome - nobody wants to be the one to ask "what the heck does this actually measure?"

Ah, the classic "I'll just install this cool new tool" saga that ends with your entire workflow in shambles. Cursor (an AI coding assistant) decided it wasn't content being just another app—it wanted to be THE app by hijacking the sacred 'code' command. This is why we can't have nice things in tech. Some product manager somewhere thought, "You know what developers would love? If we silently changed their muscle memory commands without asking!" Ten years of typing the same command, and suddenly you're launching the wrong app because some DevEx team decided their tool deserves keyboard shortcut supremacy. The real kicker is the "No prompt. No warning. Just broken flow." That's developer tool installation in its purest form—surprise chaos with a side of productivity loss. Always read the install scripts, kids. DevEx might be in the details, but so is the devil.

Ah, the pinnacle of modern tech innovation - changing a loading spinner's text and suddenly becoming an AI company. Because apparently all it takes to join the AI gold rush is making your users think your app is "thinking" instead of just, you know, fetching data from a database. This is the software equivalent of putting on glasses to look smarter. Next week they'll add rainbow colors to the spinner and become a "quantum computing startup." Venture capitalists, please form an orderly queue with your checkbooks ready.

Oh. My. GOD. The existential crisis of our generation in TWO FRAMES?! 💀 First he's like "I don't care if AI wins over programmers" acting all tough and unbothered. Then BOOM—the punchline hits: "I just need FAANG to lose." It's the tech industry's villain origin story! Doesn't care about the robot apocalypse as long as those Silicon Valley giants get taken down with us. The PETTINESS! The DRAMA! The absolute CHAOS of prioritizing corporate revenge over humanity's survival! We're not just coding anymore, we're picking sides in the tech civil war. And honestly? Mood.