We Are Safe

Microsoft really said "you know what developers need? Copilot in literally everything" and just kept going. We've got Copilot in VS Code, Copilot in Windows, Copilot in Edge, Copilot in Office, Copilot in GitHub, and probably Copilot in your toaster by next quarter. The beautiful irony here is that both users AND Microsoft agree on one thing: they hate Copilot. Users hate the AI suggestions cluttering their workflow, the subscription fees, and the fact that it sometimes generates code that looks like it was written by a caffeinated intern at 4 AM. Meanwhile, Microsoft's solution to everyone hating Copilot? Obviously more Copilot. Because if one AI assistant annoying you doesn't work, surely seventeen will do the trick. It's the tech equivalent of "the beatings will continue until morale improves" but make it AI-powered and charge $10/month for it.

Ah, the classic "let's use a sledgehammer to kill a fly" approach. Every tech startup these days thinks they need machine learning to solve problems that could be handled with an if-statement and a cup of coffee. After 15 years in the industry, I've sat through countless pitch meetings where some bright-eyed founder explains how their revolutionary AI will disrupt the sandwich-ordering process. Meanwhile, their actual problem is that they can't figure out how to store user preferences in a database. The real kicker? When they finally implement their neural network to predict topping preferences, it works worse than random chance. But hey, at least they can put "AI-powered" in their pitch deck!

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute TRAGEDY of tech layoffs in one perfect comic! 😭 Everyone's playing the blame game while the ACTUAL reason for tech unemployment (economic cycles and market uncertainty) gets you LITERALLY DEFENESTRATED from the building! The audacity! The drama! Meanwhile, AI and "foreigners" get all the blame because heaven forbid we acknowledge the boring truth that capitalism has ups and downs. No no, much easier to dramatically point fingers at the shiny new tech or people who don't look like us! The tech industry really said "We don't do nuance here, sweetie. Now fly out this window with your reasonable explanation!" ✈️💨

So Anthropic's CEO thinks we'll hit peak AI code generation by 2026, but someone's already done the math on what comes after the hype cycle. Turns out when AI writes 100% of the code, we'll need humans again—not to write code, but to decipher whatever eldritch horror the models have conjured up. Senior engineers will become glorified janitors with 10x salaries, which honestly sounds about right given how much we already get paid to fix other people's code. The future is just the present with extra steps and better excuses for technical debt.

The beautiful irony of our times: programmers clutching their pearls over AI generating sprites and icons, while artists are out here speedrunning Python tutorials to automate their workflows. Turns out everyone just wants to skip the part they're bad at. Programmers can't draw stick figures to save their lives, and artists would rather learn regex than manually process 10,000 files. It's like watching two people swap problems and both thinking they got the better deal.

The evolutionary scale of debugging techniques laid bare! At the top, we have the panicked screaming of devs using StackOverflow and ChatGPT - frantically searching for someone else who's encountered their exact error message. But then there's that rare specimen - the dev who calmly reads official documentation to solve problems. The absolute madlad sitting there with a smug grin, methodically understanding the system instead of copy-pasting random solutions. It's like finding a unicorn in the wild. Who actually reads the manual? Next you'll tell me they write comprehensive comments and follow naming conventions too!