The AI Doomsday Prophet's LinkedIn Strategy

The classic startup founder strategy: drop buzzwords like "AI" and "ML" while looking suspiciously like a baby in a tuxedo threatening investors. Nothing says "I'm totally qualified to run a tech company" like combining artificial intelligence jargon with mild extortion! The tiny suit really sells the "I've definitely completed multiple successful exits" vibe. VC funding secured in 3... 2... 1...

Oh, the DRAMA of modern coding! 💅 First, you beg Copilot for help like it's some coding messiah. Then you desperately turn to AI, practically on your knees, hoping it'll save your pathetic bug-ridden code. And what do you get? THE MOST INSULTING GARBAGE ANSWER EVER CONCEIVED BY DIGITAL INTELLIGENCE! 😤 It's like asking a chef for cooking tips and they suggest eating the raw chicken because "it looks done enough." Fine then! I'll just fix it myself while dramatically sighing loud enough for my neighbors to hear! The trust issues I've developed with AI assistants will require YEARS of therapy!

When asked about AI integration in job applications, this person went full eldritch horror mode instead of the usual "I used ChatGPT to debug my code" nonsense. The poetic description of AI as a forest monster that "speaks with a thousand voices" and "wears your face" is both hauntingly accurate and infinitely more interesting than whatever corporate-friendly answer HR was fishing for. Bonus points for acknowledging the existential dread of AI tools that "know not truth from lie, though it speaks them all the same" while everyone else pretends they're just fancy spell-checkers.

Oh, the sweet innocence of "I made a website with ChatGPT" followed by sending a local file path instead of a URL. That's like telling someone you're a chef because you microwaved a Hot Pocket. What we're witnessing here is the beautiful collision of Dunning-Kruger effect and file system confusion. Our friend thinks they've launched the next Facebook when they've really just saved an HTML file to their downloads folder. No server, no hosting, just pure unbridled confidence. The Windows file path is just *chef's kiss* perfect - nothing says "I'm a web developer" like trying to share C:\Users\ben\Downloads\index.html through iMessage.

The duality of modern developers: initially impressed by shiny new AI features, followed immediately by the desperate search for the "off" button. GitHub Copilot might finish your code, but it also finishes your patience when it confidently suggests the wrong solution for the fifth time in a row. The real 10x developer move isn't using AI—it's knowing exactly when to turn it off.

Remember when we argued about text editors like they were sports teams? Now we're just watching AI companies slap version numbers on VS Code forks like they're NFTs. "My VS Code fork has more digits than yours" is the new "my dad can beat up your dad." Meanwhile, Emacs users are still configuring their first keystroke from 1976.