The #2 Programmer Excuse For Legitimately Slacking Off

OMG, the AUDACITY of these tech companies! 💅 First they're all "AI agents will revolutionize everything!" *dramatic hair flip* But pull off that ghost sheet mask and SURPRISE! It's just the same old automation workflows we've been using since the Paleolithic era of computing, but with fancier marketing! The tech industry really thinks we're all just standing here with our mouths open waiting for them to rebrand "if-then statements" as "autonomous intelligence." I CANNOT EVEN with this level of deception! *faints onto Victorian chaise lounge*

Copilot: "I executed the Python code" but forgot the actual code part! Classic AI assistant move - all results, zero implementation. That's like a chef saying "I cooked the meal, here's your empty plate!" The timestamp is there, but where's the datetime.now().strftime() magic that made it happen? Developers staring at this response are left to figure out the datetime formatting incantations themselves. The irony of an AI coding assistant that skips the most important part - the code!

The absolute chaos of these import aliases would make any self-respecting data scientist twitch uncontrollably. It's like deliberately swapping all the labels in someone's meticulously organized spice rack. TensorFlow as "plt"? Pandas as "tf"? This is psychological warfare in Python form. This is the coding equivalent of putting pineapple on pizza and serving it to an Italian chef. The beautiful part is how efficiently it triggers data scientists—just four lines of code to induce a complete mental breakdown. Truly elegant villainy.

The classic tech hype cycle in its natural habitat. First, AI writes 90% of code. Then AI writes 100% of code. Then reality hits and humans get paid premium wages to fix the AI's spaghetti code. Reminds me of that time we deployed an "automated" monitoring system that generated so many false alerts we had to hire three people just to monitor the monitoring system. Progress!

You spend days crafting a pull request, refactoring everything, writing tests, adding documentation, making it absolutely beautiful. Then some bot rolls up and says "Full of AI slop, completely unhelpful" and you just... lose it. The real gut punch? Half the time the bot is right. With AI code generators flooding repos with generic solutions and copy-paste answers, human-written code is starting to look suspiciously similar to GPT's homework. We've reached the point where genuine effort gets flagged as synthetic garbage while actual AI slop sneaks through because it happened to use the right buzzwords. The Turing test has officially reversed: now we have to prove we're NOT robots.

Behold, the inevitable conclusion of asking ChatGPT "how to free up space on Linux." Everything was going so well until it wasn't. Those reassuring green "OK" messages lulling you into a false sense of security before the system realizes someone just deleted its ability to, you know, execute programs . The dynamic linker is basically the thing that loads libraries when you run programs. Delete that and... well... *gestures at the red error messages*. Just another day of AI-assisted system administration - works perfectly until your computer transforms into an expensive paperweight.