Prompt Developers: The Christmas Identity Crisis

Grammar correction in the wild. King declares himself "the dumbest man alive," only to be immediately dethroned when someone mentions "AI prompt engineering is the future." The true champion of ignorance has been found. Happens to the best of us—one minute you're the dumbest person in the room, then someone walks in talking about their revolutionary prompt that just says "make it good" with fifteen exclamation points.

ChatGPT taking a full 34 seconds to transform "yo G" into a corporate email greeting is the digital equivalent of rehearsing a phone call 17 times before dialing. That AI is definitely sweating in binary while crafting the perfect response that screams "I definitely know how to human correctly." Next update: GPT-5 with built-in social anxiety and the ability to ghost conversations for days.

The ultimate video compression algorithm! This dev created a function that identifies and removes "unnecessary" frames from movies—and apparently decided that 99.9999% of Fast & Furious is just excessive explosion footage. The algorithm is technically correct (the best kind of correct)—if you strip out everything except the plot, you're left with approximately 0.042 seconds of content. Reminds me of that time I optimized our codebase by deleting all the comments, whitespace, error handling, and user interface. Ship it!

HONEY, THE IMPOSTOR SYNDROME IS REAL! That's a black lab swimming with ducks who have NO IDEA they've been infiltrated by a completely different species! Just like when you've been copy-pasting ChatGPT code for a week straight and somehow convinced the entire engineering team you're a coding genius! The whole dev team is like "Great job on that algorithm!" while you're frantically Googling what a for-loop is. Swimming in a sea of competent developers while your brain is screaming "QUACK QUACK I'M TOTALLY A PROGRAMMER" is the most relatable thing ever. We're all just dogs in a duck pond pretending we know what we're doing!

Nothing says family bonding like your dad confidently proclaiming your career's imminent doom. The classic "AI will replace programmers" statement—delivered with the same certainty as "you should've been a doctor" and "have you tried turning it off and on again?" Meanwhile, programmers everywhere are writing the AI that supposedly will replace them, debugging its hallucinations, and fixing its broken dependencies. The irony is thicker than legacy code comments. But sure, Dad. I guarantee the robots will take my job right after they figure out how to untangle my spaghetti code and decipher what "// TODO: fix this later" actually means.

Ever opened a PR from an AI and seen comments like // This is a for loop that iterates through the array ? Welcome to the world of AI-generated documentation—where stating the painfully obvious is considered helpful. It's like having that one intern who explains what a keyboard is every time you sit down to code. Next up: ChatGPT will helpfully inform you that your function returns a value and that variables store data. Revolutionary stuff.