AI With Social Anxiety

The "stack" used to mean React, Node, MongoDB. Now it's three browser tabs of AI chatbots doing all the actual work while you pretend to understand what they just generated. Full-stack developer has been redefined as "full stack of AI assistants open simultaneously." The tech stack is now literally just... tabs. No databases, no frameworks, no architecture decisions—just Claude, ChatGPT, and Perplexity carrying your entire career on their digital backs. At least you're honest about it.

The Mona Lisa of debugging sessions. Four hours past your intended bedtime, and there you are, still whispering sweet nothings to your code that refuses to cooperate. That slight smile isn't artistic genius—it's the delirious grin of someone who's forgotten what sleep feels like but is too stubborn to admit defeat. "Just one more prompt to the AI and surely it'll fix my code this time." Narrator: It did not fix the code.

When you accidentally push to production instead of staging... 😬 Someone's first day on the job just became their last! Nothing says "I'm fired" quite like leaking government AI plans on GitHub because you confused your repositories. Pro tip: Maybe don't store national secrets with the same tool you use for your personal "learning-to-code" projects. That resume is about to have an interesting gap year.

That sweet, sweet moment when you're sipping your whiskey, feeling like a coding god because your AI buddy just cranked out what would've taken your team a week. Then reality hits—you've just birthed a Frankenstein's monster of spaghetti code that nobody (including you) will understand next month. But hey, ship it now, debug it later, right? Future you can deal with those mysterious dependencies and undocumented functions. It's not technical debt if you never plan to pay it back!

Asked Copilot to create a simple flexbox layout and it decided to spawn the Inception of div containers. That conditional at the top should've been v-if="canCreateNightmare" . Nothing says "I'm helping" like turning a 3-line layout into the HTML equivalent of a Russian nesting doll. And the best part? All that code just to add the same gap-4 everywhere. Efficiency at its finest!

The JavaScript ecosystem's greatest fear: finding out some random AI model was trained on their npm packages. The title "I Tsc Alled Dis Ti Lla Tion" is a play on "distillation" - the process where AI models learn from other models - but butchered to include "tsc" (TypeScript compiler) and broken into syllables like someone having a panic attack. Nothing sends a JavaScript developer into hysterics faster than discovering their precious code snippets are now being regurgitated by ChatGPT. Meanwhile, the logos for TypeScript, React, and Node.js perfectly represent the frameworks watching their intellectual property get slurped up by the AI void.