AI Can't Count To Ten

The existential dread of leaving your IDE unattended for 5 minutes only to return and find your machine compiling Skynet. That moment when npm install decides to rebuild the entire dependency tree because you accidentally typed "y" while half asleep. Your computer's gone from "Hello World" to "Hello New World Order" real quick. The scariest part? You don't even have admin privileges in this new relationship.

ChatGPT out here killing the comedy industry by explaining its own jokes. The irony of asking for a joke that's "hard to get at first" and then immediately getting a complete breakdown of the punchline is just *chef's kiss*. Stand-up comedians spend years perfecting delivery and timing, meanwhile AI is like "here's the joke AND a detailed explanation of why you should find it funny." Next up: ChatGPT explains why explaining jokes makes them less funny.

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of these ChatGPT-wielding imposters! 💅 They waltz into interviews like "I'm a programmer" with their chest puffed out, but when asked about actual languages they know? *dramatic gasp* They whisper "ChatGPT" and suddenly everyone loses their minds! It's like showing up to a knife fight with a spork and expecting to be taken seriously! The coding community is LITERALLY having a collective aneurysm watching people who couldn't write a for-loop to save their lives claiming developer status because they can prompt an AI. Honey, asking ChatGPT to code for you doesn't make you a programmer any more than asking Siri for directions makes you a cartographer!

The classic learning curve of doom! Newbie programmers staring up at the programming staircase of despair where even the first step (Hello World) looks like Mount Everest. Meanwhile, they're already Googling "how to build Skynet with no programming experience" and wondering why their neural networks aren't sentient yet. The irony is that most tutorials literally start with printing "Hello World" to the console, but somehow folks want to skip straight to building the next ChatGPT without understanding variables. It's like trying to compose a symphony when you can't even play "Hot Cross Buns" on the recorder.

The duality of Google's AI strategy in its full glory! Upper text: "25% of new Google code is AI-generated." Lower graph: "Massive spike in Google outages." That red spike isn't just a graph—it's the visualization of what happens when your AI autocompletes semicolons with emojis and replaces error handling with "try { } catch (e) { // TODO: fix later lol }". Correlation doesn't imply causation... but that spike is suspiciously vertical right when the AI started writing production code. Coincidence? I think not!

Ah, the classic "tell us about your AI tools" question. The perfect trap for developers who've been using ChatGPT to write 90% of their code for the last year. Do I admit I outsource my brain to silicon, or pretend I still remember how loops work? It's like asking a chef if they use pre-minced garlic. We all do it, but nobody wants to be the first to confess in the interview.