You're A Computer Harry

Content Linux: Makes the OS faster and more configurable MacOS: Makes the OS easier to use and more dependable Windows: 1313 duh 063 ProgrammerHumo

Ah, the classic tech industry paradox! A grocery store wants a sysadmin with Cisco certifications, Azure experience, VMware skills, on-call hours, AND the ability to lift 50 pounds... all for the princely sum of $23.80/hour ($49,504/year). That's like asking someone who can build a nuclear reactor to also flip the burgers at the cafeteria for minimum wage. The real cherry on top? "Occasional lifting" and "on-call weekends" - because nothing says "we value your 7+ years of specialized technical expertise" like making you haul servers around and fix the CEO's printer at 2am on a Sunday for less than what some entry-level developers make. This is the tech equivalent of "we're looking for a brain surgeon with 10 years experience who also does plumbing, for the competitive salary of whatever we found in the couch cushions."

Linux users watching through the blinds as Windows gamers get excited about Battlefield 6. Just another day in the "I use Linux, by the way" club, where gaming support remains the eternal unicorn. Sure, Proton exists, but we all know it'll be six months before it works without corrupting your entire home directory. Meanwhile, we'll just be over here compiling our kernel... again.

That moment when you finally build your first gaming PC after years on console, and suddenly there's a portal to another dimension of configuration options. Look at Morty freaking out over all those settings! His brain is executing a panic.exe while Rick's just standing there like "Yeah, welcome to PC gaming, where the frame rates are uncapped and the graphics settings actually matter." Console gamers: "Press X to play." PC gamers: "Let me just tweak these 47 graphics settings, configure my RGB lighting, update 3 different drivers, and troubleshoot why my second monitor keeps flickering when I launch Steam."

The first thing you do with a fresh Windows install? Search "Chrome" in Edge. Then Edge is like, "Wait! We're basically the same now! Both Chromium-based! Please stay!" It's the digital equivalent of that desperate ex who changed their entire personality to be more like your new partner. Sorry Edge, but changing your engine to Chromium doesn't erase those years of Internet Explorer trauma. Some trust issues just run too deep.

Content I work in IT, which is the reason our house has: - mechanical locks - mechanical windows - routers using OpenWRT - no smart home crap - no AlexaGoogle Assistant... - no internet connected thermostats Tech Enthusiasts: Everything in my house is wired to the Internet of Things! I control it all from my smartphone! My smart-house is bluetooth enabled and I can give it voice commands via alexa! I love the future! Programmers Engineers: The most recent piece of technology I own is a printer from 2004 and I keep a loaded gun ready to shoot it if it ever makes an unexpected noise.