Never Had It Happen

Content Time spent on Java development lava 17 5 10 10 10 Reading long errors Messing with Maven Thinking OOP Depency inyection Spring JPA Actually coding 60

Content Ash ashcammm Programmersliterally only want one thing and it's fucking disgusting 2017-10-22, 1:56 AM 5575 5575 HEAP SUMMARY: 5575 in use at exit: 0 bytes in 0 blocks 5575 total heap usage: 2,040 allocs, 2,040 frees, 37,558 bytes allocated 55755 5575 All heap blocks were freed - - no leaks are possible 5575 5575 For lists of detected and suppressed errors, rerun with: -s 5575 ERROR SUMMARY: 0 errors from 0 contexts (suppressed: 0 from 0)

The legendary "one more bug" lie that's haunted developers since COBOL was cool. Your colleague says they're "almost done" with that quick fix, and suddenly you've aged 84 years waiting for the PR. That "simple bug" unleashed a Lovecraftian nightmare of dependency conflicts, undocumented features, and spaghetti code from 2003. The best part? When they finally emerge from their debugging trance, they'll say "that was weird" and move on while you've lost half your lifespan and most of your hair.

Content SHOULDN'T YOU BE STUDYING FOR YOUR TURING TEST? RELAX, IT'S NOT FOR ANOTHER WEEK. But a Japed AND FOR THE ESSAY PORTION, WHERE WE HAD YOU DESCRIBE WHAT A ROSE MEANS TO YoU, SO, UH... D-DID I PASS? IT'S TODAY! OH SHIT! YoU PLAgIArIZED THE ENTIRE WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE FOR "ROSE. AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN REMOVE THE CITATIONS ... (HMM. butajape..com

The suspicious stare that says "I don't trust code that works on the first try." Ten years in the trenches teaches you that immediate success is the most terrifying outcome possible. No errors? No warnings? Something is definitely wrong. The universe doesn't just hand out compiler blessings like that without planning some catastrophic runtime surprise later. The real debugging starts after your code works perfectly. That's when you frantically add console logs everywhere because silent success is far more concerning than a stack trace that at least has the decency to tell you what you broke.

Content In 2009 a pigeon named Winston raced Telkom, South Africa's largest ISP, to see who could deliver 4GB of data to a location 60 miles away the fastest. By the time Winston arrived with the 4GB flash drive, Telkom had transmitted only 4 of the data. EPA