Working Outside

Content How can we improve our code? Replace "master" -with "main Replace. "Blacklist" with "Denylist" Reduce our technical debt

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Ah, the classic client move that makes you question your entire career choices. You spend 120 precious minutes of your life meticulously explaining every technical detail, answering questions, and providing clarifications on the project specs. Your throat is dry. Your soul is weary. And then comes the royal decree: "Just send all that in an email." It's the corporate equivalent of "Let me speak to your manager" after the manager has already spoken to you. The aristocratic expression in the image perfectly captures that feeling of aristocratic entitlement that makes you want to time-travel back to before you accepted the meeting invite.

Oh. My. God. The absolute TRAGEDY of the missing 404 drink! 💀 For the uninitiated peasants (aka non-developers), 404 is the infamous HTTP status code for "Not Found" when a web page doesn't exist. So this vending machine showing slot 404 as EMPTY is literally the most poetic thing I've ever seen in my miserable coding life. The drink in position 404 CANNOT BE FOUND! It's the universe's way of trolling us! And explaining this to your mom? Please! She'd have better luck understanding quantum physics while riding a unicycle!

Content This technique for appraising developers was subsequently dropped, but some senior engineers in banking say it's not as bad as it looks. One executive director in the engineering team of a US bank says lines of code (LOC) are an important part of the calculus when appraising a developer's competency and the value of keeping himher. "Almost always, top performers have a high LOC count relative to the team or a high number of projects contributed to. Low performers tend to have low LOC relative to the team," he says. Other methods of measuring the quality of engineers have been tried, but they haven't always succeeded. JPMorgan, for example, introduced a system called BlueOptima to monitor the efficiency of its developers in late 2019, but it was discontinued after complaints. After plugging in a productivity analytics platform' for its developers, Credit Suisse showcased the following chart in its long-forgotten 2017 investor day presentation. It suggests that a few top performing teams do most of the work.