The Seven Deadly Dev Archetypes

Ah, the seven deadly archetypes of every engineering team. I've worked with all of these people, and I've been all these people—sometimes in the same sprint.

My personal favorite is "The Silent Operator" who hasn't spoken since the company holiday party of 2019 but somehow commits the exact fix at 2 AM while everyone else is arguing in Slack.

And don't get me started on "The System Rebuilder." Sure, event sourcing sounds amazing in theory—right up until you're explaining to the CEO why the shopping cart needs six months of refactoring.

The real unicorn is someone who's none of these. If you find them, lock the door and hide their passport.