The Current Job Market Nowadays

Congratulations on your instant promotion! Nothing says "I'm ready for this responsibility" like clutching your coffee with the thousand-yard stare of someone who just inherited 200,000 lines of undocumented legacy code. One day you're asking questions, the next day you're the oracle everyone turns to. "But I just figured out where the config files are..." Too late, friend. Time to grow that beard and develop a caffeine tolerance that would kill a small horse.

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The ABSOLUTE PEAK of solo developer dignity! 💅 Creating a pull request on your own repository and then dramatically switching hats to approve it yourself is the coding equivalent of giving yourself a medal! It's that special moment when you pretend there's an actual code review happening, but it's just you having a conversation with yourself like some kind of Git schizophrenia. "Hmm, this code looks FABULOUS, darling! Who wrote it? Oh wait—IT WAS ME!" The ceremonial self-merge: simultaneously the most pathetic and most empowering ritual in solo development history!

Content Kristen DiMercurio kdimerc A tip for those of us who work at screens all day: 1. Unclench your jaw 2. Twist your torso from side to side 3. Arch backwards til you're upside down with your hands and feet on the floor 4. Laugh 5. Spider crawl across the room 6. Devour someone whole 7. Haunt the witnesses 22:54 - 32619 Twitter for iPhone

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